Clients and Northern Shadows

              

   Northern Shadows 3 of Swords

I am having a hard time describing the card.

This is tooooooo close!

Right now.

This is, as if S and J are standing before me, right now, holding baby Willow.

See, Willow, Willow was not supposed to be here….

I think???

…………….or maybe she was…. .

Sometimes things go VERY wrong…..

Hydrops fetalis is one of these things.

S found out in week 21 of her pregnancy – and decided against a late abortion.

Willow was born still, but modern medicine knows a lot of tricks and they got the heart going again…. and she went on a ventilator – and she had 9 surgeries to fix/ manage the hydrops and several other problems like a closed left lung, a none functioning stomach and ….. a loooooong list…..

She was at the hospital for all her almost 2 years of “life”, never opening her one good eye, never even crying – never moving even one limb……

Slooooly but surely S and J recognized the “hounds of hell,” that rode over their little family.

The priest who spoke of “god’s mysterious ways” and the holy gift of life, that should not be denied, …. = why the tubes needed to stay in……

Yes, modern medicine tried EVERYTHING.

And S and J and Willow suffered through everything.

Somehow they had heard of scruffy little me and came, wanting to know, if I could help.

Journeying showed, that Willow’s Spirit was not in her body – not since she left the womb.

Willow’s Spirit was back on the Tree of Life, where it belonged….

And no, you do not have to give up being a christian in order to come here and ….

….pray for the unthinkable……

You are her parents and the unthinkable is to allow Willow’s body to return home.

You can safely pray here

to anyone you need to

to find the strength to……… :love:

They cried….

They prayed…..

They found the strength to

turn of the machines and the Spirit of Mercy took her physical form away, back into the loving arms of Umai Ee’ne, the Earth Mother.

The hounds of hell are still riding…

…..jumping across the empty cradle in the baby bedroom,

over J.’s outbursts of anger

and race through the nightmares of S.

When will their hoof beat subside?

Sunday

Sunday they will come out to my house.

We will sing lullabies to Spirit baby Willow.

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3 thoughts on “Clients and Northern Shadows

  1. Tell them a stranger they will never know will also be drumming Sunday for our little Willow and their aching hearts. They did the right thing, the only thing.
    Sharyn

  2. A mother will fight to the death for her child so to find them gone or be forced to let them go is a wound nobody else can know. That feeling of desperate sadness, failure and all the ‘what if’s’ are crippling. My heartfelt and genuine love goes out to Willows parents and Skitters too who share this tragic time together.

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