Death in triplicate

This week I am sticking my nose back into the large Mary-El box. My friend Gregory E. is coming over and we will hopefully have a good talk about this deck. I can use a few pointers :)So here is a little something about Death:

I feel, the Mary El Tarot deck has 3 Death cards

Death of the ego:

To me this card does not show the usual Death and transformation we see in other decks.

This one: Death of the ego, bringing a serene androgynous balance between passions and knowledge on the one side and the feelings of love, attachment and personal preferences on the other.

What then grows is the true wisdom of non attachment symbolized in the flowing white hair that extends beyond the card into infinity.

The eyes are not dead. They are black pools that have seen it all.

10 of cups:



We all have the 10 of wands inside us, racing ahead, in time, towards the inevitable end of our mortal existence while fighting to keep alive- praying the wild ride is not over sooooo soon. Re-incarnation you ask? Honestly: Are YOU ready for it, RIGHT NOW! This minute?

Or would you rather ride the red Horse of escape?

Get the transplant, get the chemo, Not go on the Titanic, whom we all know, is doomed…..

We love Life and we do not want it to end. Not now anyway, (not ever….)

Welcoming the end of the ride?

We are not “there yet”

We will be, some day, when life feels like pacing the mortal cage.

When we are, we are, where the XIII is now.

But before? No, before we are there, we are this, and we have a lot of spunk in us – yet……

This card to me shows all our will to survive, our biological fear of death, the Death we carry inside us from the moment of conception.

10 of Swords:

The Grim Reaper:

This would make a magnificent single Death card for any other deck!

Is it the proverbial Grim Reaper or is it Morgana le Fey, out to collect the fallen soldiers from the battlefield?

Is it us, you -or me getting up the gumption to take out the scythe and cut all the dross out of our lives? Piles of Tarot decks we do not relay use, oooold boyfriends, who-s kiss tastes stale, bosses bubbling caustic venom….. Al that…. It is ready to be cut of since quite a while. When you pull this card, will you dare to – – become the Grim Reaper yourself – and cut it? All of it! Quick, merciless and efficient…?

Before this crazzzzy ride is over, we have a decision to make:

Our mortal hull –

Will we give it to the Worm Mother to recycle – or to the Phoenix and his eternal flame


So: What have I been up to in terms of Tarot during the last few weeks?

Well, My dear friend Rowena from Aussi-land send me a very sweet present:

The Shadowskapes Tarot featuring the fantasy art of Stephanie Pui-Mun Law! 🙂

This deck had been on my wish list for quite a while. But every time I saw it in the store I looked at it – and ultimately put it back on the shelf., thinking, that a deck featuring fairies and Dragons is not really “my thing”

I would have loved to just look at the deck and its intricate artwork, but read with it?

But what a very pleasant surprise it was, when I held this little treasure in my hands: The detail in the artwork is amazing! Multitudes of small Spirits appear in every single card, emerging from the rocks, Trees, Plants and other background features, each single one drawn in detail and portraying a distinct character worthy of appearing on a card of its own. Musical instruments are woven into trees, rocks are made up out of Nautilus shells and fossilized Snails, Dragon horns and Earth fairy tails. Mystical Fibonacci Spiral designs are found in almost every card, formed by the tails of Foxes and Dragons, the roots and branches of Trees, and again rock formations.

I am at a loss to describe it all, so if you do not already know the deck, you have to visit the artist’s site and look at the images:


Some of my favorite cards are:

The Tree Spirit Hierophant is one of the nicest one I have ever seen

The Queen of Wands and the King of Pentacles

But I also love the comparatively simple 3 of Wands and the 8 of Pentacles

The High Priestess – there is an Owl on it – what else can I say…. 😉

The 3 and 8 of Swords are exquisitely sad.

Although there is a lot going on in each card I do not feel overwhelmed or as if being distracted.

Without being “fluffy”the deck for me is a gentle and refreshing change away from the harsh realities of life, death and stress and worries in a modern goal oriented world

Something else to mention are the gorgeous card backs and the silky smooth feeling of the card stock 🙂

I am quite pleased, that I find it easy to read with it, for myself in daily draws and more importantly for others, who are looking for answers to their serious questions.

How Buzzard got his Feathers:

Last night we had our monthly Longhouse meeting and the telling of legends is always a part of it.


So this time the Sachem shared toe story of Buzzard (Vulture) getting his feathers with us. 

The Haudenosaunee culture is an oral one and only now are some of these stories being written down. Here I am trying my best, to retell this one:


How the Buzzard (Vulture) got his feathers:

Along time ago the Birds had no clothing. They spoke like people, but they were shy and hid from sight. One day they decided to hold a great council.

“We must go to Creator and ask him for clothing,” said Eagle. So it was decided. But who would carry the message?

Many Birds volunteered, but finally they chose Buzzard. He could fly great distances because of his long wings, and he could soar higher than any of the other Birds and so come more easily aaaaal the way upto the sun-place, where Creator lived. All of the Birds burned Tobacco and sent their prayers up to Creator, and then Buzzard set out on his way.

It was a long journey. Buzzard flew and flew and flew. He ate the food he had carried with him and still he was far from the place of Creator. He became hungry, After a while, he was so hungry that he stopped and ate some dead Fish washed up on the shore below him. This Fish were rotten and smelled bad, but his hunger was great, and he did not mind.

He continued on his way, he went higher and higher….

Now he was close to the Place of the Sun, the Creator’s home; It grew fiery hot from the sun, but still he flew up and up. The skin on top of his naked head burned red in the sun’s heat, but at last he came to the place of Creator.

“I have been waiting for you,” Creator said,
“because I have heard the prayers of the Birds. I will give you clothes made of fine feathers to take back.”
Then he showed Buzzard the clothing he had prepared. It was fine indeed. There was a huuuuuge bag full of different feather suits. There were as many colors in the feathers as there are in the Rainbow Snake that arches across the sky after a rain, and the feathers shone so brightly that Buzzard had to turn his eyes away from them.

“Now,” Creator said, “I know how hard it was for you to fly to me. You may have the first choice of all these suits of feathers. Remember, though, you may try on each suit only once. If you do not want it, let it fall down onto Mother Earth for your friends to catch

Buzzard was very pleased. “I must choose the finest feathers,” he said to himself. “Then everyone will see them and always remember it was me, who brought back clothing for my brother and sister Birds.

He tried on a suit of bright blue and white feather with a jaunty cap. “No,” he said, taking it off, “not bright enough.” And so that suit fell down down down and all the way down on Mother Earth it was caught by the Blue Jay, who put it on right away and was VERY pleased.

He tried on another suit of brilliant red and black with a tall crest. “No,” he said, “I do not look good in red.” And so that suit fell down down down and all the way down where it was caught by the Cardinal.

He tried on another suit of gray and black with scarlet vest. Again he was not satisfied, and that go and it went to Robin.

He put on a suit as yellow as the sun with hand some dark markings. “Too much black on this one,” he said, and that suit went to Goldfinch.

Creator patiently watched Buzzard trying on one suit after another. None of them were quite right.

Buzzard, watch out” Creator said. “The bag is getting empty”

buzzard did not listen. He kept trying on suits.
ometimes the feathers were too long. Sometimes they were not long enough. Some were too dark, others too light. None of them seemed to be just right for the messenger of all the Birds.

Finally Buzzard put on a the very last suit of clothes that was on the bottom of the bag. It was scraggly looking with rather scruffy feathers that had no shine at all to them, just dull dark brown. It also was tooooo small for him! Although all of the other clothes had grown larger or smaller to magicly fit him, this last suit of feathers was very tight.

Buzzard pulled and strained. And finally he got it on. But it hardly fit and so he hung his wings in a arched bow, to lessen the strain, moving from leg to leg trying to stretch the outfit just a little more…. His legs and his neck were left bare bare; the red skin of his bald head remained uncovered. 😦

He looked at the suit.

Not fine!

Not fine at all.

The feathers were sooo lack-luster. Buzzard was not pleased.

“This is the worst of all,” he said.

Creator smiled. “Buzzard,” he said, “it is the only one, that is left….

Now it will have to be yours.”

And so to this day you can see Buzzard wearing the suit that he earned for himself. He still eats things long dead because of what he ate on his journey to the place of Creator. And though some make fun of t he way he looks, Buzzard still remembers that he
was the only one who could make that long journey.

Even in his suit of dirty feathers that fits him so badly, even with his head burned scarlet from the heat of the sun, he remembers that he .was chosen to bethe messenger for all the birds. When he circles high in the sky, he is close to Creator. Then, even in
illfitting suit of feathers, he is sooooo proud ..


















Divine Abundance

My card today:

I am Divine Abundance!


It is true!

I am divine abundance and I am going to take this abundance to the Gravenhurst Farmers’ Market and set it all up and share it with others.

What a nice plan!

It is dark, rainy, and an icy North wind is blowing, as we set up. We struggggle with the tents and the sidewalls billowing in the gusts and knocking things over.

But 30 years of experience helps and 90 minutes later we are done. It looks soooo nice and promising. All the abundance set up in our tent and also in all the tents of our fellow vendors.

Now we all stand there – and wait. In the cooooold wind.

Peter shows of the few fresh Fiddle Heads he picked this morning.

No customers

Nobody in his or her right mind is venturing out in this weather. The thermometer fell from 12degrees Centigrade at 8.00am to 7 degrees at 10.00am. It should be the other way round!!! It should get warmer!!

It does not. (By nightfall we will have frost)

A few hurried shoppers brace themselves against the wind and walk from tent to tent, checking out all the divine abundance and lucky for us, we have 2 customers. A pair of Tree earrings and a Sterling silver Bear on Deer antler find a home in the hearts of their new owners.

Set tree earrings and pendant, Sterling Silver
hand crafted by us

Sterling Silver Bear on Deer Antler

Other vendors are not so lucky.

The 2 lovely and talented ladies across from us sell nothing.

We all are cooooooold!

I am wearing my winter jacket and have wrapped myself up in a sun-yellow wool blanket. Peter is asleep in our car.

We are all waiting for the time to pass, that 2.00 pm arrives and we can pack up.

At 1.00 it starts to drizzle.

Our neighbor had already taken down his tarps and now all the beautiful abundance on his table was getting wet 😦

 By 1.45 most of us have started packing up, glad, that we have a reason to move around and so – warm up

 At 2.15 all our abundances are packed away again, we are ready to leave, – and the sun comes out……

Better luck next week

Hope to see you all at the Market then!



Shameless advertisement alert:

See our abundance at


Divine meditation

On my last foray into town I found a nice little deck of meditation cards in the Sally Anne: I am Divine, by Barbara Burke.

Theyr design is simple and tasteful, a 3 toned intuitive painting, a golden dot to center your meditative gaze and at affirmation like

I am divine balance,

I am divine grace

or I am divine mind.

  A little booklet accompanies the cards and elaborates on the affirmation.

I quite enjoy drawing a card every morning and have persuaded my husband to do so as well 🙂

Pecke’s Feathers:

A few weeks ago we lost one of our 2 resident Hairy Woodpeckers. I wrote about it here:

Today I kept my promise and made the first pairs of earrings from his feathers.

Here they are:

Hairy Woodpeckers have mostly spotted flight and tail feathers. Just one pair of tail feathers are different: the ones the Bird uses as “struts” to balance and stabilize his body while he is pecking into tree trunks. The tiny red feathers are from the back of his head.











.I still miss him 😦

A friend of mine has a very special spiritual connection to Woodpeckers.

She will receive one of these pairs.

A Totem is a Clan Guardian, NOT a personal Spirit guide!!!!

I try my very best to teach people the important differences of a

Clan Guardian or Totem Animal and a personal Spirit Guide.

Here I will try to explain:

The Guardian of you family Clan is your Clan Totem:

If you are a person from a traditional =indigenous culture, in all likelihood you and all your family members have a Clan Guardian, a spiritual entity independent of your personal Guardians and Guides.

If your family is patrilineal all kids have dad’s Clan, mom however has a different Clan.

All the different Clans have a long history, certain rites, maybe ceremonies and also certain responsibilities towards the other Clans in the web of the tribal community. As a member of the Clan these responsibilities are your’s as well.

You can not marry a person from the same Clan as your own = dad’s Clan. In some tribes, you can not marry a person of your mother’s Clan either.

That taboo also goes for a person from a Clan that is of a different people but has the same Clan Totem = Animal or Plant Guardian.

For example: I am a member of the Wolf Clan of our Siberian tribe. BUT ALL members of all Wolf Clans everywhere are my family members and so I could not marry another member of the Wolf Clan of the Haudenosaunee or any other Wolf Clan anywhere on Mother Earth.

The Haudenosaunee Clan system is matrilineal but still!!!!

From my maternal Grandmother and her female ancestors I am an Usari = Bear Clan so I sit with the Bear Clan people of the Longhouse, because they are matrilineal.

Bear is their Totem = another word in Algonquin language for Clan Guardian.

BUT iffff then a none First Nation person comes and tells anyone of us about their Wolf – or Bear or Mouse Totem – or whatever they feel their “Totem” is or has appeared to them, we all get offended. It is NOT their Totem, unless they are Wolf -or Mouse Clan!

It is maybe their – or your personal Guide or Guardian Animal –

But for them – or you to use the word Totem is wrong and insensitive. For some people it is even quite insulting. People using the word totem indiscriminately are becoming “bad weather” right then and there!!!

On Beltane

On Beltane

Sky Father is weeping

soft cold tears

that nourish the Earth Mother

during her labor pains

Birthing new greens

birthing new growth

birthing new life

to walk and dance upon her.

Like the Moose

dancing on gangly legs

across a landscape of tussocks

soggy with the juices

from the belly of the Mother

They fill their bellies

 with the leaves of water lilies

She birthed


for them……..

We saw them while having breakfast, slowly wading through the wetlands across from the house.
All pictures by Peter J. with Nikon D500 with tele lense 70/300 from living room window