A Solstice Song given by the Spirits:

The other day, Peter and me were invited to a Christmas party.

It was nice: friends and acquaintances, good food, laughter and fun. Fun especially, because there were “Christmas party games”

As you know, we are anything but Christians and not very familiar with all the customs of the seasons, so we both drew blanks when it got to a game where one has to recite or even sing one many of the popular Christmas songs.

The only one I knew was Rudolph the red nosed Reindeer – (I HAVE to know that one, 🙂 my paternal Siberian Ancestors were / are Reindeer herders from the north side of the mighty Yenisei river in north-east Tuva.) And of Silent Night I only know and could sing the Cree text…..

Some of our friends were surprised and one of them suggested I should come and sing it like that in his church. 

I do not think it is my place, to sing a christian song in a Native American language in a church – after all what the churches did and still do to Native Culture……

Oh well….

The next morning at home I had a bit of a migraine (repercussions for eating the delicious cheese appetizers) and so instead of rushing around, I had to sit still in the semidarkness of dawn– and had time to think.:

How much acculturated am I?

What other X-mas songs do I know?

What are the songs of the Winter Solstice of my own Siberian culture?

My Ada was anything other than a singer, he rather hollered and growled to the stomping rhythm of his large shaman staff witch had rattles and bells attached. A rather frightening ruckus he made with it!

I also do remember the Solstice Chant, that calls the Owl Guardians, asking them for protection through the long icy winter nights. I also remember the trance rhythms we are to drum, when the shaman walks around the village, asking for Blessings and protection and then sits out the long and frigid night up on a snowy windy rock promontory or even atop a tall Tree chanting and praying for everyone in the hamlet. This after all was my great grandmother Ulali’s job.

I also know, that when the Wolves do answer or join into that lonely chant, it is seen as VERY fortuitous for the new solar year.

It is a velvety soft pulling thing/ feeling, when the trance comes in – and takes hold.

Somehow the melody and words of the Huron Carol floated into my mind…..

Then the scenery before my eyes changed.

A wintry night

deep snow, the moon up, full, just before midnight

Ice crystals glistening on all the Spruce Tree branches, bark cracking in -50 below

This is HOME = Siberia…….

A Wolf…….

entering the clearing filled with more than Moon and Star light…..

and then the words came in

on the melody….

A female Elder’s voice…..


T’was in the Moon of Wintertime

an old Wolf this way came

He had a ragged mangy coat

and on one foot he was lame.

He had a rotten toothless throat

and a stomach full of hunger pain

He knew that Death would be a grace

to an old wreck of his mighty race….

So he walked towards the Morning Star – – –

-and was surprised what he there saw- –

A beautiful glittering Reindeer dame

A Spirit with her antlers aflame

Life Magic from her heart did glow,

Love and mercy in her eyes did show,

She touche him with her sacred hand

to send him off to Never- Land…

But oh– he felt the Magic swell…….

the old Wolf changed to young and well!

His coat aglow in the sparkling snow,

his teeth all trim, feet fast and slim

Deep in his heart the Wolf did know

that never again old and frail he’ll grow

For all time he’ll wander through the night

all lost Souls home her was to guide

Sooo thankful for this Sacred Gift

into the air his snout he lift

and sang the first chant ever done

That on Solstice night

Star Maiden would come

To take away all pain and fear

So you all too live another year

So sing with me the Börü chant

that it will ring across this land….



Much much later, tears streaming down my face, hands still shaking, but migraine gone completely,

I managed to write it down, in 1 uninterrupted “flow-stream”…..

Still tears of thankfulness dripping onto the paper……

They are coming back, as I am sitting here now, typing it.

I know, the song, is based on one of the many E’eren Börü, legends of my Ancestors.

I also know, it is not for me alone, it is given, so I can share it with the community.

It says, “So you all too live another year!”

It is a little like something my Great gran Ulali would bring back from her midwinter night ordeal, to share with the people……

Solstice Blessings!

So you all too will live another year!


Fisher Medicine Guide?

After the previous post appeared, I was asked; When I do see a Fisher – or in this case Mathilda, in a shamanic sense, what does that mean to me?

What Medicine wisdom does Mathilda – or any other Fisher carry – or point towards?

In front of workshop window (2)

For me personally a Fisher has the connotation of “adversity” living , dealing and overcoming adversity – and reaping the rewards of that.

How come?

It has its roots in how my neighbours see and HATE Fishers, How I fear MR Fisher and his appetite for Raccoon babies, how I remember the tears when “Midnight” my friend Barb’s cat got taken by a Fisher……

So when we moved here learned to despise Fishers…..

But then, about 10 years ago I had a friend come to see me – as a client – with the thread of a a rather nasty and debilitating condition hanging over her head. She is a gifted healer herself and this “thing” was threatening her independence and her livelihood. So we got to work on what was causing it and send it packing! As Medicine Gifts for that healing help she gave me a Fisher foot and a Bear Claw. During the “workings” I called on the Spirit of that Fisher to please forgive the trespass on his life and also asked, iffff he was willing to help getting rid of that problem. He was, and over all these years did a good job.

Since then that Fisher foot is on my Client Altar to help, keep my friend safe.

But soon / about a week after this shamanic session the first Fisher showed herself to me- in Animal form. I think, somewhere on this blog there is a post about it…. I have to look….

Anyway, that one we named Bissiger Beisse = “BB” = the Sharp-toothed Biting One”.

The Fisher Queen on wellfare

Soon after, even her mate appeared at the door. He is about twice as big as “BB” and had NO Fear of us at all and after only a day or 2 he took food from my hand, carefully keeping his sharp teeth in check.

Often he sat at the sliding door, waiting for me, to give him a treat.

The Fisher King

Peter thought this was soooo extraordinary, that he made for me an FFO = A “Fisher Feeding Order, complete with a staff, a Fisher head-shot and a bunch of chocolate Easter eggs, for which Mr Fisher developed a craving……

Order of the Fisher feeders sm

When the snow melted, both Fishers disappeared back into the forest- and our Raccoons all re-emerged from their hibernation trees.

So we now have a positive relationship with the wild Fishers of our surrounding forest and the Ee’ren of the Fishers = the Manitou of them sometimes helps me on trance journeys, pointing out adversities a client faces but is not conscious about.

Is he one of my Miahanits?

No, He is one of my friend’s Miahanits for sure, although I am not sure if she, as an Anishinaabe lady would see it that way……

She is a reader here and I wonder, ifff she will speak to the matter……♥!

As I said, she is a gifted healer and I would love to beat the “word of mouth drum” for her.

We neeeeeeed many more like her.

making pretty for another egg (2)

All my Relations

A few months ago we finalllly invested in a new TV.

RCA and like everything else these days, it was manufactured in China.

About 6 weeks ago we suddenly noticed, that there was a bug in it.

Yes, literally! In the lower right quadrant of the view field there was a small centipede!


How did it get there?


What was even more disturbing was, that we soon noticed, that it was alive!!!

It mover around. It was obviously “stuck” somewhere at its mid- section, but head and tail crawled here and there as far up down. Right and left as the stuck mid- section allowed. Poor thing. My shamanic prayers always end with “Blessings to all my Relations” – meaning ALL life on Earth and beyond and “let there be no suffering”

So now, here, with the news we nightly also witnessed this poor Shape-Changer’s suffering.

We tried to get it out, but no luck. Kill it? Peter pressed a thumb on it- pushing onto the soft surface screen of the unit. Nothing. Its little antennas continued to move and its many feet moved here and there and tried to get free…..

Days passed. What is it eating, that it i still alive???

Then we went on vacation – for 8 days.

Upon our return – the little Creature was just as alive and strugggglingas before.

I started to get nightmares about being stuck and unable to get out.

Finally last night I sat in front of the TV and “concentrated”.

On the space widening and softening, on becoming “open”

When, after quite a while I opened my eyes again, the Centipede was gone!

I first could not belief that; but on the other hand, shamanizing always brings results. Often the ones we want, when, ifffff our “want” is in unison with Mother Earth.

Then, today around noon I noticed something.

A small movement on the floor 1 1/2 meters away from the TV and towards the sliding door to the deck.

The Centipede!

Peter took a quick picture and then I took him/ her outside, to a half rotten log that was warmed by the sun.

Good luck!

Take care; winter will be here soon.

Centipede 1

free at last!

Shiva’s Dance:

25.4. 2015  Shamanic journey:

Altar for Nepal

I felt compelled to set up a little memorial Altar for all the People of Nepal.

The ones that passed

The ones that survived

The ones suffering The ones that are helping

Everyone involved.

I feel involved, because we have been there.

In this beautiful country with sooo many of its gentle people living in the simplest conditions – some in what WE call poverty.

Then I took my drum- urgently, because the trance was coming on fast.

A few beats and I was THERE!

Scenes drifted by with me as an observer…….

People in the streets – surprisingly mostly men – Where are the women? Where are the children?

Many men were holding cell phones – others were engaged in helping, digging away rubble – brick by brick…. Then a HUUUUUGE semi-transparent Snow Leopard – a Spirit Being jumping onto a huge pile of concrete and re-bar – a collapsed structure. Hissing and scratching with his see-through paws, then jumping of to grab a large brown mongrel dog with a black tipped tail and dragging it up onto the pile of debris – making it scratch – and bark – and so alerting the ever present men., who soon began clearing away smaller pieces of rubble – then trying to hand down a plastic water bottle – to no avail- the person below has his hands trapped ( and crushing injuries to his pelvis and abdomen) Not good for survival even if he makes it to one of the overcrowded hospitals. Someone opened the bottle and poured the continence over the man’s head and into his open mouth…….

Grey Spirit Beings, transparent, like the Snow leopard, walking away, up in the sky above…. Souls on their way towards re-incarnation.

Bhola! Where is Bhola?

I am looking through the window of my Mt. Kailash rock crystal.


The Portal

From the fist size stone on my makeshift altar it has changed into a HUUUUGE mountain of ice, snow and clear crystal.

This one starts to tumble and roll, changes into an Earth sphere = where the whole world is seen like in an atlas. It lands with Europe on top –

Ah, I ge it, he is “over there! 🙂 I then see him, somewhere, in the city centre, in amongst some green plants, white shirt – maybe his shaman outfit – with some smudges of fresh blood on his chest, where his heart is – his heat is bleeding for all his people….he seems exhausted, but OK.

Then I am in ?

…. Bhaktapur -? The city centre is in ruin! Soo sad! The shop, just off Druban square, where I bought my nice Owl…. in ruin and rubble…. but no lives lost, just dust, bricks, wooden planks and broken carvings, large and small. People sifting through it, saving what they can…..

A few streets on the “drum shop” …. Bricks and wood and the ever present tangle of electricity lines – dust and debris, but the shop still stands, with part of the upper story of the house having come down… Here too people clearing the narrow lane way, saving what they can and not knowing, where to put stuff they recovered. …..

The Pottery market – where my Rhino is from – all just rubble, all just pottery shards….

The cobble stone plaza right before me starts to buckle and heave and out of the cobblestones a life sized Rhino emerges, shakes itself, looks at me: “It has always been like this – only “THIS” was not always here!” The primordial Beast shakes it’s head and moves off, down the street…..

Shiva, blue as always he is depicted dances upon the chest of a “monster”



He has done that for ages of eternity. But sometimes, on rhythmic occasions (having to do with 80 sun cycles ) the monster moves. Sometimes Shiva just looses a step or so, regains his balance and dances on.

No big deal. Sometimes Shiva stumbles- steps off the monster, with 1 foot….. and then steps back on, in his dance. Sometimes he loses his step, because the monster rears up quite a bit and both feet come off, then Chungmolungma grows and his backbone becomes higher – and yes, She also shakes off some of the snow, and it comes crashing down.

This dance has taken place for aeons. Sometimes the Monster beneath Shiva – which by now is clearly to be seen as a Green, living female Elder, releases the Nagas from caves deeeep down in her womb and they come forth as Snakes of molten rock……

Sometimes, Aeons ago, Some Beings living upon this Earth Elder – regardless of the dancing Shiva, get hurt, when She moves. Then they get trapped beneath Shiva’s feet- or swept down by beads of his sweat……

It was always like this! Shiva is blue = for truth!

Usually the Animal Beings sense, where Shiva’s feet are, and when the Earth woman moves- and they get out of the way – fast….. Most make it – others become food for the survivors and then become part of the Earth Woman – until she sweats them out and up to live between Shiva’s feet again…..

Now maaany of the Earth Beings have started to erect dwellings out of stone and wood upon the Earth Woman – right between Shiva’s feet. Sometimes he stubs his toes on them, when they get toooo high!

But now, when the Earth Woman moves, these dwellings topple over, killing them = returning them to her womb.

It happened before – it will happen again…… it is always a tragedy, when it happens.

But Shiva dances on, regardless.

The scenery shifts

I see a giant Turtle, swimming in??? The sky!?? – no, in the water, carrying the world, as in Native American world view. She too is very much alive, of course! She moves, her back shakes, then, she lowers her head and dives beneath the waters, while a HUUUUUGE wave washes over her back, drenching all that live there, washing some of them off into the sea. The Turtle re-emerges and swims on….


Somewhere I realize, the tone of the drum changed!

It is wet!

Everything is wet!

My Altar,


I too got drenched, when she moved??

The beautiful sun in which I started drumming had turned into yet another icy April shower and I better get “with it” and get inside, save all my things, dry them out and put dry cloth on!

By the time I did that, the sun is back out again – and through it all I still see Shiva dancing……

I re-erect the little Altar in the living room, adding my hand carved Owl from that shop in Bhaktapur.

Then I go outside and distribute the Gift for the Spirits of the Land – this land, where I live and The Land, we all inhabit.

A Sunflower Seed for everyone who died.

A Sunflower Seed for everyone who survived

A Sunflower Seed for everyone who is helping

A Sunflower Seed for everyone who feels connected

We are all connected.

Please Shiva, dance gently on Earth Woman!


Rhime of reason

I  don’t know, I don’t know…

….shall I leave it , shall I go

I am toooo old,

I have no time

to put genetics

into my mind


Often in trance I see an array

of waving lines, that move and sway

asking my guides, what could they be

“It’s double Snakes, that you do see”

A double helix waves along,

but on its side, is something wrong,

That bluish blob does not belong.

What does it mean, that I there see

and what

for it

the cure could be?

will I learn that,

if I go

What healer am I,

that does not know…..


….……………….Mi-Shell J  February 21


= when I’m awake…….

and it is night….

when I am talking

to my guide……

when I am asking

for advice

receive an answer –

– not always nice…

blue owl


Soooo – I think, it is time for a little update as to what I am up to the days.

Well, busy for sure. Now in late October whenever the weather is halfway decent Peter and me are working hard – getting winter wood ready. Recent storms have brought down some huuuuge Maples, that we cut and carry out of the bush, section by section…..

Then there are a couple of craft shows coming up and while it is raining Cats, Dogs and Howler Monkeys – or rather Chipmunks, Weasels and caterwauling Catamounts we are making jewellery, lots of little things, that are fit for small budgets. Many of them are inspired by the recent trip to Bon Echo and Algonquin Park:DSC_5927

Spirit Boat petroglyph:


 I am also making a few nice Medicine Pieces.

Like this Rattle for example:

Shamans Rattle 1

here is another view

SR 2

While sitting on working on pieces like this, I again think back on the “Vision-Teachings I received at Bon Echo and I yet again find myself drawing the pictographs seen on the face of the rocks = or their counterparts shimmering in the water onto the leather of my Medicine items.

The sonorous voice of a long-time enspirited Medicine Person reaches from the beyond into my ear – or rather my soul:

They call it Bon Echo.

But not for the voices reflecting back from the rock walls.

The bon echo is the one coming of the Medicine Spirits as they dance in the Water and teach the People!”

I reflect about these reflections……..

Bon Echo indeed!

_DSC0753 (2)

Mazinaw Manitous!



The vision/teaching

as received:



“Be still – and listen!


This is the way…

….the way it was always done

…..by the people:

Mashkikiwe’ agaaming”  ~Lake Medicine

Be still The Spirits are with you

“The waters open

and the Manitous come


from the cracks”





Some see them…..

…….others do not.

They just see the reflections

in the water……”




“As above, so below…..


…..Until it is not…..”


“Ojika’ago biishin…..

Spirits dance out of the cracks

….not in the rock walls

….but in the waters!”


“And so the shaman becomes a Manitou”

“Wearing the Boat.”


“More than ordinary knowledge”

“It comes from the Teachers in the Spirit Cave”

“Go there!”


Spirit Cave

“The canoe

flies through the Sky world!”

DSCN4848 - Copy


“The Shaman speak to Thunderbirds!”

“Then – becomes the Thunderbird…..

Thunderbird reflection

and paints it in wunamin……”

“Mu zi nu hi gun…”

“Find the boat



of the Moose!”



In Spirit it’s all the same….”



Shamanic snot:


Oh, you got sick?

As a shaman you should not get sick!”

I hear that often.

Have your spirits deserted you”?

Well, NO!

Who said shamans do not get sick?

Get the flue? Get cancer, heart disease and die???

Have you ever seen = talked to a shaman that is 526 years ooooold and fresh and vigorous as a spring Chicken, goes about his work with the sick, frightened and the depressed and the ones in mourning?

NO, that is NOT how this works!!!

Shamans are just ordinary people with ordinary bodies and ordinary every day problems.

At least I am…. – Well, I have met a few others, that ACTED, as if they were not – but – guess what – one of them got cancer and the other one had a stroke at 48 and is now living in a extended care facility……

Sooooo Yes, I got the flue!!!!!

I went down to the city to a Drum Circle and one of the participants, who occasionally comes up to my place, when I teach, gave me the most sincere and heart felt bear hug.. and then told everyone, that his loved one was home with the flue and he had it too – just a little bit…..


Next day I was sneezing and it all went snotty from there!

Bad immune system hah??

Well, maybe – mine has to fight off “something” that someone has got for most every day…..

And all the snow shovelling and ice chopping and more snow shovelling while I was home alone for a month over X-mas and New Years and so on took something out of my 58 year oooold creaky bones.

Aah! when Peter cam back from visiting his family it was sooo good to just “flop” and relax!

Yeah! And then the bugggg got me! 😦sick_7

So: Fever!

Fever and fever dreams

Fever and journeying…..

Because, iffff I can not reallly sleep, and I are not reallly awake, and there are already images and sensations dancing around the margins of my ordinary consciousness, – I might as well journey and see, what I see” and learn…..

So: call all my Miahanits!

Jammer and sniffle and cough to them my mystery and after sneezing once again – (watch out, this blog post is contaminated with shaman snot……!! – as iffff there is not enough already of THAT all over the internet…..!!??)

Steam bath – late at night – shaman, de- snott thyself!! – right….

Under a towel, but still there is a little light, shining into the glass bowl filled with steaming hot water, augmented with Eucalyptus oil and fresh Peppermint leaves –

Green and yellowish dancing bubbles of oil reflecting the light getting larger and larger, vapour manifesting…… whitish grey fur speckled with beige brown spots – — and we are off!

Ee’en Omsür racing me to a deserted cave in a Tree-less, vegetation -less cave somewhere north of nowhere – of the NOWHERE desert – of Taklamakan… All dust in a dust bowl…..

….. I can not breath!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yeah, well, what else is new….

OK, there on the wall it is, signs – like in our Journey Cave…..

The Yak-headed God!

Now – How many hands and feet has he got?

And in all those hands he is holding a whole arsenal o – ??? kitchen implements……

Buddhist kitchen implements that is….

Yamantaka's stuff

But kitchen is a place to prepare food – food for thought – or at least learning……

I see Ee’ren Omsür leaving – going to another cave nearby, where – a Lady SnowLeopard is hissing a not so very welcome……

Go – by “she says –

It clicks in my head – and sinuses…

Goby – Goby desert!! – that’s where this is…..

Gobi Altai…

Breathe deep and looooook into the bowl – where was Yamantaka?

Oh! Here!

He is alone in the cave of dust….. all his implements are nicely set up on the floor – It looks like a display of exotic pieces – pieces of jewellery – on the table of one of our craft shows. All nicely lined up.

With nothing in all his hands he roars billowing foggy steam at me – which smells like Peppermint….

Yeah Yeah – I get it… Breath deep!

Yama, Why do you need all these things?

Why do you need me to be scared of you?

I am not a Buddhist – or Bön practitioner

I am … there is no fancy word for “just me”, but now all my Miahanits are in the cave with me – us and it is rather crowded – and sticky….

There also is a fire on….Like the fire at home, in our Journey cave!

And with a flash THERE we are – all of us,Yama included. Without his “stufffff!!

Oh, without all his arms and legs too! Just one set of arms, utterly un-decorated he sits down next to Eeren Eder (Reindeer Spirit of my ancestor lineage….) looking forlorn and confused.

The big Drum is beating…. intoning our mantra chant…

I am a part of the universe

and the Universe is a part of me.

You are a part of the …..


Yama, all these arms, legs and Power tools you have, – it’s the People’s attempt to visually express, how omnipotent you are, that you are universe = Everything!!!!”

was that me – or Fretty saying that out loud?

Other Goddesses appear with 8 arms? Some with 20 arms?? 1000 arms, all holding a weapon or Power Tool in each hand? –

Well, HOW ELSE could Buddhist teachers, iconographers, Tangka painters, story tellers portray, convey, bring across to the People the Omnipresence and Omnipotence and Power of the Spirit.

Nishia “picture emotes”: ”Everything is illusion! So also all the Power tools are illusion. All that is real

is the all encompassing radiance of the all encompassing benevolent Power!

How do we in Siberia depict this very same concept?

a saymaly-tash,kirghistan

Creator Spirit Petroglyph from Siberia

How do the Aishenabe People here at home depict it?

a petroglyph provincial park ontario

“Great Spirit” Petroglyph from Peterborough,Ontario

Like this !

And how did Peter’s Ancestors …?


a tübingen,germany

All Power Spirit from Tuebingen, Germany

And California’s Natives??


There is a big loud cluttering happening as hundreds, maybe thousands of arms filled with implements and Power tools fall to the ground, a deafening cluttering noise, then filling the cave with smoke and dust.

Coughing, I see the Goddesses and Gods all standing there, wearing nothing but the halo of Power. They look sooooooo relieved, no more heavy weights to carry – they can breath!!

Or is it me?

I can breath!

Oh good!

The water in my bowl has stopped steaming.

My tea spoon had fallen to the ground….

I am back at our living room table with my towel over my head…..



 The weeks and months after I got home from Nepal have been busy. Not only with all the normal every day stuff I have to do, especially in a rough winter, there was also a lot of personal shamanic work to be done.

What was that strange blue/ blackish Spirit that somehow managed to ad himself to my luggage? Oh, it was a him all right, he had the “equipment” all ready and raised!


How nice!

Whenever I held / meditated with my beautiful Kailash crystal rock, he appeared, either motionless and static starring at me – or dancing like a whirlwind flinging countless feet into the air, arms and hands filled with a whole souvenir shop full of pots and “bumba” vases and dorjes and bells……

These were the 3 things I recognized and for a while I had the feeling, I should have bought some like that in one such souvenir stand during our trip.

So- I started looking….. who could that Being be?

What is his connection to Mt Kailash? Could this maybe be Cakrasamvara who is to be envisions as sitting in a yap/yum sexual union with his consort inside the gigantic crystal that is Mt Kailash in the eyes of Buddhist worshippers.

There are caves at the Base of Mount Kailash, I found out! A very special place, where Milarepa meditated for years…..

I always feel drawn to caves… Should I journey into that one and try and find our?

Uh – Waaaaaay tooooo scarrrry for me – and I am not into “acquiring” any more strange Spirits from a pantheon I know very little about…..

Where had I seen this Spirit first? Yes, right, in Nyima’s house…..

That was the first time, when he manifested – at least his head and torso, – as if he was “stuck” somehow and could not get out – or back where he came from……

Journey to- into Nyima’s house??????????????

NO!! Waaaaay!!!!!!!!!!!

Tooooo intrusive and disrespectful to the family living there!

I would NOT do that – unless one of their life depends on it!

Shaman ethics 101 lesson here!

But journey to that beautiful place “outside” where I “saw” Nyima and the Animals on the grass….

Maybe one of the Animals was there and could “help”

Shaman ethics 101 lesson: I would NEVER “call Nyima”!!!!!!

He passed over and –

-according to my ancestral tribal beliefs is now resting for 7 generations with his ancestors, until he is ready for another journey to this side of the Valley.

According to HIS Buddhist beliefs and the insights of the Lama, he is already re-incarnated into a child “up North” – meaning in Tibet.

….. So a journey to that “beautiful place” it was. For it I asked the help of Lira, who is – of course always with me, Ee’ren Omsür, who had guided me through snow covered high mountains and Fretty, who is VERY good at finding out things that are hidden……

It was confusing and loooooong, until we finallly got there, only meeting The black Yak and the Goat.

Icy wind blew clouds of whirrrrling snow down from the high mountains in the background and in the howling wind I heard a “song” or cant:

Tang lah Ta~~~~ng la~~~

Sri snying bode’ bah….”

Every icy gust that hit us repeated the phrase.

Somehow, it was clear, we were not very welcome.

A sacrifice was needed

In a little basket I had an Owl feather and some artish (juniper smudge)

No, it was not enough, although the whirling snow lessened somewhat….

Then I “saw” to my horrrror, that Ee’ren Omsür jumped forward, on top of the Goat and ripped her throat out, spilling the blood everywhere……

The Yak changed its fur from black to white and pointed behind it where a rugged trail was visible, leading up to a high mountain, majestic and snow covered, now beneath bright sunshine and the bluest sky you can imagine. On the way there was a huuuuge natural rock arch, majestic, stark, mysterious, regal….

A sacred site.Thang-lha'i rgyal-sgo, gNam-mtsho

We made our way there. Standing beneath this majestic arch I said something like:”In all respect and humility I have come here to ask for help with a powerful spirit that comes into my visions and dreams. I am asking to understand who he is and what I am supposed to learn from/ through him. I wish to give the proper respect, but do not know how…….”

The answer was:

You have spilled Blood

Blood is Life

Life is Death

Death is Life


is Death

and Life.“

No sooner were these words “transmitted”, that the scene shimmered away and we were back with the dead Goat and the black Yak.

Ee’ren Omsür proceeded to eat the Goat, Fretty was waiting for his admittance to the feast and I was left standing, ready to return home, glad, that Goat is not on Lira’s meal plan……..

Tuvan ornament

Bringing this information back, I did my obligatory “thank you smudge”, then wrote down what I remembered, especially the song and what the Spirits said….

  • Goooooogled it:

Of course, like always, my orthography sucked and Jammatanka had to change into Yamantaka, until things became VERY clear!

Lord of Death!

All decked out in his Buddhist form 🙂

 Yamantaka 03

about this spirit:


about the arch picture:

I discovered a picture of a surprisingly similar arch to the one I “visited” during the trance journey on this valluable web site: