What’s in a name?

6 of Wands:

archangel michael:

Oooooh but YES! I do have a problem with him!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Not with the image on the card, but with the being he is supposed to depict, with archangel Michael of the christians.

With Michael!!!!

See: Ada, my father named me Mi-Shell. But my mother, having barely and with loss of friends, family, dignity and sanity just ever sooo barely escaped the concentration camp and its gas chambers wanted only one thing for me:

To be SAVE!!!!!

Save from the next holocaust.

Save from the next power wielding set of madmen.

So she had devised a plan: Make the little baby christian and give her a christian name, so she would be spared, the next time around…..

My father wanted none of that. He hated christians and that they professed one thing and did quite the opposite when nobody was watching –like kill people by the thousands in the name of their god….

But with the name thing my mother had a point and she knew it. Using this little trick had saved my fathers first family – and himself on several occasions during his time as a spy for the Russians and later the Americans in WWII.

What little trick you ask?

Fake names: When you are making your living as a spy, fake names – lots of fake names and birth dates and home towns and whole fake families are a tool of the trade.

When WWII rolled around my father had gone to the forger and had made up a whole set of fake papers for his first wife, who was Jewish, for his daughter Mausi, my half sister and of course for himself. It saved Mausi and her mom from the fate that many others had no way of escaping.

Ada also dropped his father’s Russian name. Going into the forger’s office a Russian emigrant, he came back out a true blue German with a christian name to keep him safe on the job….. It was one of many names he used and the surname I grew up with and went to school with was …. well better not spill toooo many beans on the internet……

At home we had a beautiful coffee jar full of fake passports and drivers licenses and so on – all with different names and different professions and different birth dates – And all with my Ada’s picture on them. I used to play with them, when I was lonely….

But I entered school not as Mi-Shell – “What kind of a word is THAT?” the school clerk asked my father – and: “WHAT???? NO religion???? You HAVE to have a religion! Without it she can not be admitted into school. So, what is it? Catholic or protestant? God forbid, you are Jews…..”

Luckily I can not quite recall just what my father answered her, but it was LOUD, contained nasty words and went with lots of expansive hand and arm movements…… But it could not change everything:

I entered first grade as Michaela – but still no religion 🙂

But when asked my name I always told the teacher my real name and was corrected often with the remark ”Michaela for the archangel Michael!”

I hated that and blamed that “stupid angel” for it all!!

Well, in terms of names things for me were still going to get worse, when a month before my 10th birthday I was taken away from my pagan/ tribal parents and stuck into a christian orphanage where nobody had a name and we were known by the number of our arrival. I was child no 235

I would have given much for being named anything other than that and the hell that went with it…

where was that oh so holy angel then, when it was about keeping me safe from all that degrading mistreatment and abuse. He did not help the other kids either……

But My Clan Guardian, the Wolf, helped and I made it out of there – after 3 looong and painful years.

It was only after coming to Canada, that I finally re-claimed the name my father originally gave me ……………………………………..***……………………………………………….

 

After writing all this I have to “come up for clean fresh air” and so I will deal with the image on card in one of my next posts…..

 

Mixed messages and sadness seen through the Gaian Tarot

I had this deck on my wish list for ages.
Now, when I look at it I am wondering: What was I thinking!!??
-Well, it was back in the time, when I was on strict dial up and could not look at scans of decks or load the web sites of deck creators.
Yesterday I looked through the cards, and honestly, there are just 25 cards I like and from these only 3 I really like….
So many others are – what I feel as being “tacky” or “kitsch”.
Today I did not dare to use it for a reading for a client… It just did not feel right at all.
Now I am curious to find out how this week will develop:

Saturday

8 = Strength
Strength is a good card for me today, reminding me, – to use what I know I have at my disposal.
And here it stops
I do NOT like this card image at all!
I do not even want to describe it. A baby lion with a crown of pink flowers on his head being cradled by a dreamy looking lady dressed in pink and yellow scarves and ….

….oh forget it all, to me THAT is kitsch!

Sunday:
Child of Water:
The word invokes a very specific meaning deep in my knowledge and experience base: Child of Water is one of the 2 hero twins of the Dine’h Nation. The one, that knows the trance and knows how to heal and taught all the healing sings to the humans….
I have a very special connection to that one. My Inde’ teacher was also called a ‘tubadejine’ ….

On the card however, there is a scene like on the water’s edge at a lake.Sea weed, shells in crystal clear water, a star Fish, a hermit crab.
BUT there is a kid, maybe 3 years of age, purple dress white sun hat…
This is a REAL child = someone’s kid!

I am thrown out of whatever I was thinking and I have the feeling, I have to know this child = who’s kid this is…. It is a photograph… put into the image…..
Somehow this kills this being a Tarot card – for me….

 

 

Monday:
Explorer of Water:
There is a young guy on a surf board, catching the wave, standing up and racing it, dolphin at his side…
He looks quite like a Neanderthal youth…. from the facial features….. the fleeing chin… I still have my brain stuck in the Tarot of the Origins….
The card’s message = fast forward into the present….

Tuesday

8 of Water
A woman with dark hair is swimming in green ?? clear water. The shore with rocks and Tree stumps is visible in the background.
Again, the feeling, that I am supposed to know this woman, She is on/ in other cards too. I am not in the “in crowd” I am not part of the inside information.
I should go into the web site and look the card up. But I do not feel like sitting on the computer doing this.
Life happens AWAY from the pooooooter!!! This photograph tells me nothing about today.
Its message to me?? go swimming??????
Stay above water?? immerse yourself??? Move on your own power through a different element?
Exercise?
Be a woman out in Nature?  I an that.
It is +2C the creek is ice covered. 3 crows are slip/sliding around there. Not time to jump in for me….
I will immerse myself in my day…..

Wednesday:

3 of Waters
That one is a nice card!
3 sea Otters are playing in a kelp bed.
Otters are forever playful and gregarious.
We here have a family of river otters and now is the time to watch them playing on the rapidly melting ice, sliding from hole to hole, chasing each other, sliddering and splashing in the melt water.
What a nice site to see. the card helps to up-lift my gloomy mood.
Skitter, the Raccoon boy we hand raised all last year came out of hibernation, played with me for about an hour and then disappeared…
That was a week ago.

Since then – nothing…..
Who ate my child?

Thursday :

The 10 of Air
is a beautiful card:14 large magnificent Birds (Canada Geese? or Sandhill Cranes??) are flying in formation before the backdrop of beautiful sun-lit rosy purple clouds.
they are telling me, to rise above it, move on, but I am in 10 of Swords mood – since a few days now.
By now I am sure, Skitter has been killed, most likely by one of the many large predators out there, starving at this time of the year and just waiting for a happy, well fed young Raccoon to bumble along.
It is true, the air outside is filled with Birds returning. Spring is here.
I am frozen in sadness.
I try nor to think about it, but that does not work.

Friday:

10 of Fire:

The forest is burning – on the card only – for now…. thick smoke billows up, partially blackens out a rising slope on which mature Black Spruce Trees are fully engulfed in flames.

What will be left after this is utter destruction and a charred blackened Earth. But Black Spruce have cones, that will only open during a fire and only then release their seeds into the charcoal covered ground they need for germination.

Here, today in mid March we have + 15 Celsius at 10.00 am. It is at least 10 degrees too warm-about 12-15 degrees above what used to be normal for this time of year.

If this trend continues for the rest of the year as it has during this month – and as it is predicted by the weather experts, we will have a “summer of death as they already are beginning to call it. Scorching heat, tornadoes and heavy thunderstorms – like the one we had yesterday, when my house was directly hit by lightning and the power was knocked out.

Large scale forest fires are predicted, droughts and all kinds of other calamities…..

I do hope they are wrong.

This stuff is the last we all need….

Global warming…….

It is here.

 

Mother Earth the Turtle

Healing Earth Tarot
7 of Shields
The blue waves of the sea surround a spooked wheel with the Great Turtle and her eggs in its Center.
For me this card encompasses a whole world view:
Mother Earth the Turtle
floating within the blue blanket of Father Sky.

She is seen with her 7 eggs, symbolizing the future of us all, hinting at the next 7 generations following ours, the people, for whom we need to steward and protect our living Mother, so in turn She will continue to nurture and feed all of her living children residing on her broad back.
All the creation myth of the First Nations, in which Mother Earth the Turtle feature prominently float through my mind.

Here is one, often told in our Longhouse:

The Earth on Turtle’s Back
Long time ago, before the Earth was here, all was water. Many creatures lived in the water, swimming about. Far above the clouds, there was, however, a land where lived a powerful chief. His wife was going to have a baby. In that Sky land was a great tree with four large roots, stretching out to each of the four sacred directions, and bearing many kinds of fruits and flowers.

One night the chief’s wife dreamed that the great tree had been uprooted. The chief perceived that this was a dream of great power, and thus must be fulfilled. With great effort, the tree was uprooted, leaving a large hole in the sky. The chief’s wife leaned to look through the hole, but lost her balance and fell.

Grasping at the tree as she fell, she only managed to hold onto a handful of seeds. The water creatures below saw her falling. They realized that she was not a water creature and tried desperately to think of a way to help her.

“I have heard,” said one, “that there is earth far below the waters. Perhaps we should try to get some for her to stand upon.”

One by one the animals tried to dive down far enough to retrieve land, but one by one they failed. Finally, brave little muskrat tried one last time. Deeper and deeper she dove until her little lungs almost burst. Suddenly she found a bit of land. Scooping it up, she frantically swam to the surface. But alas, where to put the land?

The Turtle said, “Put it on my back. I will hold up the Land and the Sky Woman.” And so they did. Sky woman landed safely on Turtle’s back and was very thankful. She cast the seeds about.

The Land on the Turtle’s back became ever so beautiful. The tiny piece of Earth on the turtle’s back began to grow.

It grew and grew and grew until it formed an island in the water. The island grew larger and larger, but still the turtle bore the weight of the Earth on his back. A huge island sat in the middle of the water, and today that island is known as North America or  “Turtle Island.


But not only the Native Americans have stories about the Great Turtle, the Chinese do too and so do tribal people in Africa and Australia.
Turtle is universal.
Turtle provides grounding for all our high flying ideas, asking questions of sustainability and consideration for all life on this small and so very fragile planet.
It asks each and every one of us to do their part, not only lip service and – maybe a little recycling…..

Mother Earth the Turtle is a recurring subject in my art.
Again and again She appears,
As bone carving on a Medicine pouch,
As petroglyph drawing on a drum.
As a pendant or pin in the jewelry I make my living with…..
Each and every time I draw Her, carve Her, cut Her shape out of Sterling silver or any other metal, I am speaking her message – and the message of all my Relations.
Inspired by this card, I will today, yet again create a Turtle, draw a Turtle, speak of Turtles……

Will you hear me?

The Money Hungry Lettuce Lion???

Tarot:Tarocco Minchiate Fiorentine

Card: Coins11 Knight/ Cavalier

The Money Hungry Lettuce Lion:

Yeah!

Don’t laugh!!

That is what I see in front of me this morning.

I know NOTHING about this deck – so far and this week I want to change that.

The Money Hungry Lettuce Lion may just be the ideal card to start with.

Who is he???

Today For us??

Waaaaay back when, at the time of the Minchiate?

An “anthropomorph” – that is what an ethnologist would call him. Part human, part Animal, part Plant – and holding up a shiny gold coin as if it was the sun – of his existence? He also could be part metal. All the stuff the world is made out of.. In my shamanic World view I see a rather sad and troubled Spirit. He is holding up his Sun, but his expression is sad, resigned. Is that his fate??

What does need to change, for him to smile again?

He is young. Is it difficult to be part of sooooo many different things but really neither?

He awakens the healer of sorrows in me. That is good, compassion is, what drives me, luuuuuures me, pushes me, guides me – in my life.

I also sometimes feel like him. ( Part human, part Animal, part Plant, part metal)

Part modern western educated middle-aged woman,….

Part child of the forests of Siberia, but transplanted to a world sooo similar to home, but yet soooo different……..

Part instinctual animal -Wolf Soul sniffing along the trail of my ancestry……

Part successful artist with a reputation for the “strange” and “tribal”………

Part reluctant healer, holding on to my drum for dear life, praying for Spirits like the The Money Hungry Lettuce Lion to appear and lead me to the roots of hidden ills hiding in the bushes of my clients Souls……..

OK! let’s go!

I am used to following Spirits like this one – out into the UNKNOWN and – hopefully returning with a little bit of knowledge……

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

I show the card to my husband Peter: “He has Wolf’s feet” he says.

I ask about Centaurs and mention our trusted Siberian Griffins – but a Lion and a Human???

What’s that called in myth??

We will find out.

Peter says: He looks like Atlas, carrying the world on his shoulders…”

The journey has begun…..

http://home.worldonline.nl/~rlion/lkgode.htm

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Manticore

all about manticores: http://users.vianet.ca/grizelda/fur/mard.html