The weeks and months after I got home from Nepal have been busy. Not only with all the normal every day stuff I have to do, especially in a rough winter, there was also a lot of personal shamanic work to be done.

What was that strange blue/ blackish Spirit that somehow managed to ad himself to my luggage? Oh, it was a him all right, he had the “equipment” all ready and raised!


How nice!

Whenever I held / meditated with my beautiful Kailash crystal rock, he appeared, either motionless and static starring at me – or dancing like a whirlwind flinging countless feet into the air, arms and hands filled with a whole souvenir shop full of pots and “bumba” vases and dorjes and bells……

These were the 3 things I recognized and for a while I had the feeling, I should have bought some like that in one such souvenir stand during our trip.

So- I started looking….. who could that Being be?

What is his connection to Mt Kailash? Could this maybe be Cakrasamvara who is to be envisions as sitting in a yap/yum sexual union with his consort inside the gigantic crystal that is Mt Kailash in the eyes of Buddhist worshippers.

There are caves at the Base of Mount Kailash, I found out! A very special place, where Milarepa meditated for years…..

I always feel drawn to caves… Should I journey into that one and try and find our?

Uh – Waaaaaay tooooo scarrrry for me – and I am not into “acquiring” any more strange Spirits from a pantheon I know very little about…..

Where had I seen this Spirit first? Yes, right, in Nyima’s house…..

That was the first time, when he manifested – at least his head and torso, – as if he was “stuck” somehow and could not get out – or back where he came from……

Journey to- into Nyima’s house??????????????

NO!! Waaaaay!!!!!!!!!!!

Tooooo intrusive and disrespectful to the family living there!

I would NOT do that – unless one of their life depends on it!

Shaman ethics 101 lesson here!

But journey to that beautiful place “outside” where I “saw” Nyima and the Animals on the grass….

Maybe one of the Animals was there and could “help”

Shaman ethics 101 lesson: I would NEVER “call Nyima”!!!!!!

He passed over and –

-according to my ancestral tribal beliefs is now resting for 7 generations with his ancestors, until he is ready for another journey to this side of the Valley.

According to HIS Buddhist beliefs and the insights of the Lama, he is already re-incarnated into a child “up North” – meaning in Tibet.

….. So a journey to that “beautiful place” it was. For it I asked the help of Lira, who is – of course always with me, Ee’ren Omsür, who had guided me through snow covered high mountains and Fretty, who is VERY good at finding out things that are hidden……

It was confusing and loooooong, until we finallly got there, only meeting The black Yak and the Goat.

Icy wind blew clouds of whirrrrling snow down from the high mountains in the background and in the howling wind I heard a “song” or cant:

Tang lah Ta~~~~ng la~~~

Sri snying bode’ bah….”

Every icy gust that hit us repeated the phrase.

Somehow, it was clear, we were not very welcome.

A sacrifice was needed

In a little basket I had an Owl feather and some artish (juniper smudge)

No, it was not enough, although the whirling snow lessened somewhat….

Then I “saw” to my horrrror, that Ee’ren Omsür jumped forward, on top of the Goat and ripped her throat out, spilling the blood everywhere……

The Yak changed its fur from black to white and pointed behind it where a rugged trail was visible, leading up to a high mountain, majestic and snow covered, now beneath bright sunshine and the bluest sky you can imagine. On the way there was a huuuuge natural rock arch, majestic, stark, mysterious, regal….

A sacred site.Thang-lha'i rgyal-sgo, gNam-mtsho

We made our way there. Standing beneath this majestic arch I said something like:”In all respect and humility I have come here to ask for help with a powerful spirit that comes into my visions and dreams. I am asking to understand who he is and what I am supposed to learn from/ through him. I wish to give the proper respect, but do not know how…….”

The answer was:

You have spilled Blood

Blood is Life

Life is Death

Death is Life


is Death

and Life.“

No sooner were these words “transmitted”, that the scene shimmered away and we were back with the dead Goat and the black Yak.

Ee’ren Omsür proceeded to eat the Goat, Fretty was waiting for his admittance to the feast and I was left standing, ready to return home, glad, that Goat is not on Lira’s meal plan……..

Tuvan ornament

Bringing this information back, I did my obligatory “thank you smudge”, then wrote down what I remembered, especially the song and what the Spirits said….

  • Goooooogled it:

Of course, like always, my orthography sucked and Jammatanka had to change into Yamantaka, until things became VERY clear!

Lord of Death!

All decked out in his Buddhist form 🙂

 Yamantaka 03

about this spirit:

about the arch picture:

I discovered a picture of a surprisingly similar arch to the one I “visited” during the trance journey on this valluable web site:

NO! You may NOT!

Pashupatinath Temple complex Pashupatinath Temple entrance

Noon day heat,

people milling,

going to and fro,

bringing pujas,

burning pujas,


Tourists taking pictures of them.

Asking us to take pictures for them – and with us, for good luck!

Sacred cows,

Sacred Cows


Sacred Goats too!

A black Billy Goat

cowering down in the shade of the temple.

A brass bell around its neck

Every minute or so a worshipper steps up to ring that bell. For good luck and for Blessings to be bestowed.


Loud noise next to delicate ears created to hear the steps of the Wolf in soft grass….

I step up and in “Animal speak” = picture language ask the Billy Goat if I may ring its Bell.

He decisively turns its head away from me towards the wall.

No you may NOT”!

Seconds later a devotee steps up, grabs the bell and rings it loudly.

You are the ONLY ONE that EVER asked!” he pictured!

On time less in its life, that he is having to hear the noise ringing through his body.

Just 1 time less……

….. I do understand that- completely!

But he is alive! Not like all the thousands of Goats, Bullocks and Chickens sacrificed during the ongoing Dashain festival.

He will live out his days like this, here….. with the bell…..

A little further on the child of a ??western Tourist?? throws away an Apple, just 1 bite missing…

I go over and pick it up.

A Gift from a Tree Sister – not honoured.

A gift for the Billy Goat.

He looks up at me, as I lay the treat before him.

Surprise in Animal eyes.

He delicately nibbles his prize.

a little present

I have to run –

 -after the group……


Temple of Woman Elders:

Temple of female Elders

Shiva lingam

Shiva Lingam

Bhola and Sadhu

Bhola and a Sadhu

Journey to Ganesha:

Ganesha is the remover of obstacles and a VERY revered Spirit. Statues of him are EVERYWHERE!.
Richly decorated with red and yellow colour, Marigold Flowers and offerings of all kinds.

Bhola teaches: Tuesday is his day of honour, so this Tuesday we will journey to Ganesha.

Ganesha symbolism

Ganesha has another Animal as a means of movement: A little Mouse / Shrew!
I am reminded of a Cartoon with an Elephant and a Mouse…..
Shame on you, Mi-Shell!!
Be serious!

Read more about Ganesha here:
Our next journey assignment was, to journey to Ganesha and ask him to remove an important obstacle in our life.

Hey, wait a minute, Bhola! It is just after lunch and I ate a WHOOOOLE LOT and ifffff I now lay down I am going to fall asleeeeeep!!!!!
This is not my personal best time for journeying. But never mind that. It is an excellent exercise to practice journeying in these condition, for a time and day when there is a client in need and it counts…..
So when Bhola starts drumming, off I go…..

The big parade!

That is, what I jotted down in my diary.
We were all there: ll my Miahanits, also, oh shock the pair of Tigers, sitting together, hissing in unison….
There was also the Rhino – and all the other Animal Spirits – the ones that were not chosen by one of the participants, when we were asked to choose our personal Animal Guide….
I was upset, seeing the mighty Rhino reduced to I lifeless clay figurine, because I did not choose it. I felt horrrrrrible and guilty …..
Fretty however was in full action: Mutte3ring loudly and digging around in some leave litter, tossing sticks, leaves and garbage here and there, until he grabbed something and pulled it out: A small Mouse with a rather un- Mouse-like short tail!
“Fretty, did you rip it of?”
Obviously not, because these 2 were becoming fast friends!
This Mouse and Fretty led us all along a dusty road……
All kinds of people, Spirits, Flowers and “stuff” drifted in and out of the scene….

Suddenly there was Ganesha sitting on sort of a painted pedestal. He was all green.
Ganesha however had a baseball bat like wooden stick.
All of a sudden he hit with this stick onto the clay Rhino and it scattered apart into large pottery shards. Out of these however came a small gnome, that uttered a barrage of nasty belligerent words and scurried off into the underbrush, dirt and garbage by the road side….
Ganesha spoke” See, these -(pointing into the direction of the disappearing midget) these create their own obstacles and identify themselves by all these obstacles! The more obstacles they have, the more important they consider themselves.”
I walked over to the scattered shards of the busted Rhino. “ And I,” I asked “ I did not choose you!
I touched one of the shards and >>Boooooom!
The Rhino was there again in full size and very much a living breathing Animal! 🙂

Good for you you did NOT choose that Rhino! See, what came out of it!
You would have gotten nothing but….. obstacles!

You deal with other people’s obstacles every day.”

He waved a large black tail of ?? hair??

He brushed me and the floor around all of us with that whisk….
then he said: “Go, get your own Rhino!
Now, go home!”
Oh yes, there was the call back!

Again I was flabbbbberghastered!


And yes, I got my own little Rhino!
At the pottery market in Bhagtapur one of our group friends saw a teeny tiny Rhino, just like the one in the Animal circle tray in the ritual room and – I got that as a little present.

It is the one now with my Nepali Shaman Altar things…..
Thank you, Devi!


green ganesha

Tomorrow is Tuesday!

What obstacles should Ganesha remove for you?