A Solstice Song given by the Spirits:

The other day, Peter and me were invited to a Christmas party.

It was nice: friends and acquaintances, good food, laughter and fun. Fun especially, because there were “Christmas party games”

As you know, we are anything but Christians and not very familiar with all the customs of the seasons, so we both drew blanks when it got to a game where one has to recite or even sing one many of the popular Christmas songs.

The only one I knew was Rudolph the red nosed Reindeer – (I HAVE to know that one, 🙂 my paternal Siberian Ancestors were / are Reindeer herders from the north side of the mighty Yenisei river in north-east Tuva.) And of Silent Night I only know and could sing the Cree text…..

Some of our friends were surprised and one of them suggested I should come and sing it like that in his church. 

I do not think it is my place, to sing a christian song in a Native American language in a church – after all what the churches did and still do to Native Culture……

Oh well….

The next morning at home I had a bit of a migraine (repercussions for eating the delicious cheese appetizers) and so instead of rushing around, I had to sit still in the semidarkness of dawn– and had time to think.:

How much acculturated am I?

What other X-mas songs do I know?

What are the songs of the Winter Solstice of my own Siberian culture?

My Ada was anything other than a singer, he rather hollered and growled to the stomping rhythm of his large shaman staff witch had rattles and bells attached. A rather frightening ruckus he made with it!

I also do remember the Solstice Chant, that calls the Owl Guardians, asking them for protection through the long icy winter nights. I also remember the trance rhythms we are to drum, when the shaman walks around the village, asking for Blessings and protection and then sits out the long and frigid night up on a snowy windy rock promontory or even atop a tall Tree chanting and praying for everyone in the hamlet. This after all was my great grandmother Ulali’s job.

I also know, that when the Wolves do answer or join into that lonely chant, it is seen as VERY fortuitous for the new solar year.

It is a velvety soft pulling thing/ feeling, when the trance comes in – and takes hold.

Somehow the melody and words of the Huron Carol floated into my mind…..

Then the scenery before my eyes changed.

A wintry night

deep snow, the moon up, full, just before midnight

Ice crystals glistening on all the Spruce Tree branches, bark cracking in -50 below

This is HOME = Siberia…….

A Wolf…….

entering the clearing filled with more than Moon and Star light…..

and then the words came in

on the melody….

A female Elder’s voice…..

 

T’was in the Moon of Wintertime

an old Wolf this way came

He had a ragged mangy coat

and on one foot he was lame.

He had a rotten toothless throat

and a stomach full of hunger pain

He knew that Death would be a grace

to an old wreck of his mighty race….

So he walked towards the Morning Star – – –

-and was surprised what he there saw- –

A beautiful glittering Reindeer dame

A Spirit with her antlers aflame

Life Magic from her heart did glow,

Love and mercy in her eyes did show,

She touche him with her sacred hand

to send him off to Never- Land…

But oh– he felt the Magic swell…….

the old Wolf changed to young and well!

His coat aglow in the sparkling snow,

his teeth all trim, feet fast and slim

Deep in his heart the Wolf did know

that never again old and frail he’ll grow

For all time he’ll wander through the night

all lost Souls home her was to guide

Sooo thankful for this Sacred Gift

into the air his snout he lift

and sang the first chant ever done

That on Solstice night

Star Maiden would come

To take away all pain and fear

So you all too live another year

So sing with me the Börü chant

that it will ring across this land….

Ouuuuuuuuhouuuuuuuuu

 

Much much later, tears streaming down my face, hands still shaking, but migraine gone completely,

I managed to write it down, in 1 uninterrupted “flow-stream”…..

Still tears of thankfulness dripping onto the paper……

They are coming back, as I am sitting here now, typing it.

I know, the song, is based on one of the many E’eren Börü, legends of my Ancestors.

I also know, it is not for me alone, it is given, so I can share it with the community.

It says, “So you all too live another year!”

It is a little like something my Great gran Ulali would bring back from her midwinter night ordeal, to share with the people……

Solstice Blessings!

So you all too will live another year!

Mi-Shell

Fisher Medicine Guide?

After the previous post appeared, I was asked; When I do see a Fisher – or in this case Mathilda, in a shamanic sense, what does that mean to me?

What Medicine wisdom does Mathilda – or any other Fisher carry – or point towards?

In front of workshop window (2)

For me personally a Fisher has the connotation of “adversity” living , dealing and overcoming adversity – and reaping the rewards of that.

How come?

It has its roots in how my neighbours see and HATE Fishers, How I fear MR Fisher and his appetite for Raccoon babies, how I remember the tears when “Midnight” my friend Barb’s cat got taken by a Fisher……

So when we moved here learned to despise Fishers…..

But then, about 10 years ago I had a friend come to see me – as a client – with the thread of a a rather nasty and debilitating condition hanging over her head. She is a gifted healer herself and this “thing” was threatening her independence and her livelihood. So we got to work on what was causing it and send it packing! As Medicine Gifts for that healing help she gave me a Fisher foot and a Bear Claw. During the “workings” I called on the Spirit of that Fisher to please forgive the trespass on his life and also asked, iffff he was willing to help getting rid of that problem. He was, and over all these years did a good job.

Since then that Fisher foot is on my Client Altar to help, keep my friend safe.

But soon / about a week after this shamanic session the first Fisher showed herself to me- in Animal form. I think, somewhere on this blog there is a post about it…. I have to look….

Anyway, that one we named Bissiger Beisse = “BB” = the Sharp-toothed Biting One”.

The Fisher Queen on wellfare

Soon after, even her mate appeared at the door. He is about twice as big as “BB” and had NO Fear of us at all and after only a day or 2 he took food from my hand, carefully keeping his sharp teeth in check.

Often he sat at the sliding door, waiting for me, to give him a treat.

The Fisher King

Peter thought this was soooo extraordinary, that he made for me an FFO = A “Fisher Feeding Order, complete with a staff, a Fisher head-shot and a bunch of chocolate Easter eggs, for which Mr Fisher developed a craving……

Order of the Fisher feeders sm

When the snow melted, both Fishers disappeared back into the forest- and our Raccoons all re-emerged from their hibernation trees.

So we now have a positive relationship with the wild Fishers of our surrounding forest and the Ee’ren of the Fishers = the Manitou of them sometimes helps me on trance journeys, pointing out adversities a client faces but is not conscious about.

Is he one of my Miahanits?

No, He is one of my friend’s Miahanits for sure, although I am not sure if she, as an Anishinaabe lady would see it that way……

She is a reader here and I wonder, ifff she will speak to the matter……♥!

As I said, she is a gifted healer and I would love to beat the “word of mouth drum” for her.

We neeeeeeed many more like her.

making pretty for another egg (2)

Shiva’s Dance:

25.4. 2015  Shamanic journey:

Altar for Nepal

I felt compelled to set up a little memorial Altar for all the People of Nepal.

The ones that passed

The ones that survived

The ones suffering The ones that are helping

Everyone involved.

I feel involved, because we have been there.

In this beautiful country with sooo many of its gentle people living in the simplest conditions – some in what WE call poverty.

Then I took my drum- urgently, because the trance was coming on fast.

A few beats and I was THERE!

Scenes drifted by with me as an observer…….

People in the streets – surprisingly mostly men – Where are the women? Where are the children?

Many men were holding cell phones – others were engaged in helping, digging away rubble – brick by brick…. Then a HUUUUUGE semi-transparent Snow Leopard – a Spirit Being jumping onto a huge pile of concrete and re-bar – a collapsed structure. Hissing and scratching with his see-through paws, then jumping of to grab a large brown mongrel dog with a black tipped tail and dragging it up onto the pile of debris – making it scratch – and bark – and so alerting the ever present men., who soon began clearing away smaller pieces of rubble – then trying to hand down a plastic water bottle – to no avail- the person below has his hands trapped ( and crushing injuries to his pelvis and abdomen) Not good for survival even if he makes it to one of the overcrowded hospitals. Someone opened the bottle and poured the continence over the man’s head and into his open mouth…….

Grey Spirit Beings, transparent, like the Snow leopard, walking away, up in the sky above…. Souls on their way towards re-incarnation.

Bhola! Where is Bhola?

I am looking through the window of my Mt. Kailash rock crystal.

 

The Portal

From the fist size stone on my makeshift altar it has changed into a HUUUUGE mountain of ice, snow and clear crystal.

This one starts to tumble and roll, changes into an Earth sphere = where the whole world is seen like in an atlas. It lands with Europe on top –

Ah, I ge it, he is “over there! 🙂 I then see him, somewhere, in the city centre, in amongst some green plants, white shirt – maybe his shaman outfit – with some smudges of fresh blood on his chest, where his heart is – his heat is bleeding for all his people….he seems exhausted, but OK.

Then I am in ?

…. Bhaktapur -? The city centre is in ruin! Soo sad! The shop, just off Druban square, where I bought my nice Owl…. in ruin and rubble…. but no lives lost, just dust, bricks, wooden planks and broken carvings, large and small. People sifting through it, saving what they can…..

A few streets on the “drum shop” …. Bricks and wood and the ever present tangle of electricity lines – dust and debris, but the shop still stands, with part of the upper story of the house having come down… Here too people clearing the narrow lane way, saving what they can and not knowing, where to put stuff they recovered. …..

The Pottery market – where my Rhino is from – all just rubble, all just pottery shards….

The cobble stone plaza right before me starts to buckle and heave and out of the cobblestones a life sized Rhino emerges, shakes itself, looks at me: “It has always been like this – only “THIS” was not always here!” The primordial Beast shakes it’s head and moves off, down the street…..

Shiva, blue as always he is depicted dances upon the chest of a “monster”

fireShiva_small

 

He has done that for ages of eternity. But sometimes, on rhythmic occasions (having to do with 80 sun cycles ) the monster moves. Sometimes Shiva just looses a step or so, regains his balance and dances on.

No big deal. Sometimes Shiva stumbles- steps off the monster, with 1 foot….. and then steps back on, in his dance. Sometimes he loses his step, because the monster rears up quite a bit and both feet come off, then Chungmolungma grows and his backbone becomes higher – and yes, She also shakes off some of the snow, and it comes crashing down.

This dance has taken place for aeons. Sometimes the Monster beneath Shiva – which by now is clearly to be seen as a Green, living female Elder, releases the Nagas from caves deeeep down in her womb and they come forth as Snakes of molten rock……

Sometimes, Aeons ago, Some Beings living upon this Earth Elder – regardless of the dancing Shiva, get hurt, when She moves. Then they get trapped beneath Shiva’s feet- or swept down by beads of his sweat……

It was always like this! Shiva is blue = for truth!

Usually the Animal Beings sense, where Shiva’s feet are, and when the Earth woman moves- and they get out of the way – fast….. Most make it – others become food for the survivors and then become part of the Earth Woman – until she sweats them out and up to live between Shiva’s feet again…..

Now maaany of the Earth Beings have started to erect dwellings out of stone and wood upon the Earth Woman – right between Shiva’s feet. Sometimes he stubs his toes on them, when they get toooo high!

But now, when the Earth Woman moves, these dwellings topple over, killing them = returning them to her womb.

It happened before – it will happen again…… it is always a tragedy, when it happens.

But Shiva dances on, regardless.

The scenery shifts

I see a giant Turtle, swimming in??? The sky!?? – no, in the water, carrying the world, as in Native American world view. She too is very much alive, of course! She moves, her back shakes, then, she lowers her head and dives beneath the waters, while a HUUUUUGE wave washes over her back, drenching all that live there, washing some of them off into the sea. The Turtle re-emerges and swims on….

Forever.

Somewhere I realize, the tone of the drum changed!

It is wet!

Everything is wet!

My Altar,

Me…!!

I too got drenched, when she moved??

The beautiful sun in which I started drumming had turned into yet another icy April shower and I better get “with it” and get inside, save all my things, dry them out and put dry cloth on!

By the time I did that, the sun is back out again – and through it all I still see Shiva dancing……

I re-erect the little Altar in the living room, adding my hand carved Owl from that shop in Bhaktapur.

Then I go outside and distribute the Gift for the Spirits of the Land – this land, where I live and The Land, we all inhabit.

A Sunflower Seed for everyone who died.

A Sunflower Seed for everyone who survived

A Sunflower Seed for everyone who is helping

A Sunflower Seed for everyone who feels connected

We are all connected.

Please Shiva, dance gently on Earth Woman!

DSCN5994

Sacrifice:

 The weeks and months after I got home from Nepal have been busy. Not only with all the normal every day stuff I have to do, especially in a rough winter, there was also a lot of personal shamanic work to be done.

What was that strange blue/ blackish Spirit that somehow managed to ad himself to my luggage? Oh, it was a him all right, he had the “equipment” all ready and raised!

Potency!

How nice!

Whenever I held / meditated with my beautiful Kailash crystal rock, he appeared, either motionless and static starring at me – or dancing like a whirlwind flinging countless feet into the air, arms and hands filled with a whole souvenir shop full of pots and “bumba” vases and dorjes and bells……

These were the 3 things I recognized and for a while I had the feeling, I should have bought some like that in one such souvenir stand during our trip.

So- I started looking….. who could that Being be?

What is his connection to Mt Kailash? Could this maybe be Cakrasamvara who is to be envisions as sitting in a yap/yum sexual union with his consort inside the gigantic crystal that is Mt Kailash in the eyes of Buddhist worshippers.

There are caves at the Base of Mount Kailash, I found out! A very special place, where Milarepa meditated for years…..

I always feel drawn to caves… Should I journey into that one and try and find our?

Uh – Waaaaaay tooooo scarrrry for me – and I am not into “acquiring” any more strange Spirits from a pantheon I know very little about…..

Where had I seen this Spirit first? Yes, right, in Nyima’s house…..

That was the first time, when he manifested – at least his head and torso, – as if he was “stuck” somehow and could not get out – or back where he came from……

Journey to- into Nyima’s house??????????????

NO!! Waaaaay!!!!!!!!!!!

Tooooo intrusive and disrespectful to the family living there!

I would NOT do that – unless one of their life depends on it!

Shaman ethics 101 lesson here!

But journey to that beautiful place “outside” where I “saw” Nyima and the Animals on the grass….

Maybe one of the Animals was there and could “help”

Shaman ethics 101 lesson: I would NEVER “call Nyima”!!!!!!

He passed over and –

-according to my ancestral tribal beliefs is now resting for 7 generations with his ancestors, until he is ready for another journey to this side of the Valley.

According to HIS Buddhist beliefs and the insights of the Lama, he is already re-incarnated into a child “up North” – meaning in Tibet.

….. So a journey to that “beautiful place” it was. For it I asked the help of Lira, who is – of course always with me, Ee’ren Omsür, who had guided me through snow covered high mountains and Fretty, who is VERY good at finding out things that are hidden……

It was confusing and loooooong, until we finallly got there, only meeting The black Yak and the Goat.

Icy wind blew clouds of whirrrrling snow down from the high mountains in the background and in the howling wind I heard a “song” or cant:

Tang lah Ta~~~~ng la~~~

Sri snying bode’ bah….”

Every icy gust that hit us repeated the phrase.

Somehow, it was clear, we were not very welcome.

A sacrifice was needed

In a little basket I had an Owl feather and some artish (juniper smudge)

No, it was not enough, although the whirling snow lessened somewhat….

Then I “saw” to my horrrror, that Ee’ren Omsür jumped forward, on top of the Goat and ripped her throat out, spilling the blood everywhere……

The Yak changed its fur from black to white and pointed behind it where a rugged trail was visible, leading up to a high mountain, majestic and snow covered, now beneath bright sunshine and the bluest sky you can imagine. On the way there was a huuuuge natural rock arch, majestic, stark, mysterious, regal….

A sacred site.Thang-lha'i rgyal-sgo, gNam-mtsho

We made our way there. Standing beneath this majestic arch I said something like:”In all respect and humility I have come here to ask for help with a powerful spirit that comes into my visions and dreams. I am asking to understand who he is and what I am supposed to learn from/ through him. I wish to give the proper respect, but do not know how…….”

The answer was:

You have spilled Blood

Blood is Life

Life is Death

Death is Life

Jammatanka

is Death

and Life.“

No sooner were these words “transmitted”, that the scene shimmered away and we were back with the dead Goat and the black Yak.

Ee’ren Omsür proceeded to eat the Goat, Fretty was waiting for his admittance to the feast and I was left standing, ready to return home, glad, that Goat is not on Lira’s meal plan……..

Tuvan ornament

Bringing this information back, I did my obligatory “thank you smudge”, then wrote down what I remembered, especially the song and what the Spirits said….

  • Goooooogled it:

Of course, like always, my orthography sucked and Jammatanka had to change into Yamantaka, until things became VERY clear!

Lord of Death!

All decked out in his Buddhist form 🙂

 Yamantaka 03

about this spirit:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yamantaka

about the arch picture:

I discovered a picture of a surprisingly similar arch to the one I “visited” during the trance journey on this valluable web site:

http://www.tibetarchaeology.com/july-2010/

Journey to Ganesha:

Ganesha is the remover of obstacles and a VERY revered Spirit. Statues of him are EVERYWHERE!.
Richly decorated with red and yellow colour, Marigold Flowers and offerings of all kinds.

Bhola teaches: Tuesday is his day of honour, so this Tuesday we will journey to Ganesha.

Ganesha symbolism

Ganesha has another Animal as a means of movement: A little Mouse / Shrew!
I am reminded of a Cartoon with an Elephant and a Mouse…..
Shame on you, Mi-Shell!!
Be serious!

Read more about Ganesha here:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ganesha
Our next journey assignment was, to journey to Ganesha and ask him to remove an important obstacle in our life.

Hey, wait a minute, Bhola! It is just after lunch and I ate a WHOOOOLE LOT and ifffff I now lay down I am going to fall asleeeeeep!!!!!
This is not my personal best time for journeying. But never mind that. It is an excellent exercise to practice journeying in these condition, for a time and day when there is a client in need and it counts…..
So when Bhola starts drumming, off I go…..

The big parade!

That is, what I jotted down in my diary.
We were all there: ll my Miahanits, also, oh shock the pair of Tigers, sitting together, hissing in unison….
There was also the Rhino – and all the other Animal Spirits – the ones that were not chosen by one of the participants, when we were asked to choose our personal Animal Guide….
I was upset, seeing the mighty Rhino reduced to I lifeless clay figurine, because I did not choose it. I felt horrrrrrible and guilty …..
Fretty however was in full action: Mutte3ring loudly and digging around in some leave litter, tossing sticks, leaves and garbage here and there, until he grabbed something and pulled it out: A small Mouse with a rather un- Mouse-like short tail!
“Fretty, did you rip it of?”
Obviously not, because these 2 were becoming fast friends!
This Mouse and Fretty led us all along a dusty road……
All kinds of people, Spirits, Flowers and “stuff” drifted in and out of the scene….

Suddenly there was Ganesha sitting on sort of a painted pedestal. He was all green.
And HUUUUGE!
Ganesha however had a baseball bat like wooden stick.
All of a sudden he hit with this stick onto the clay Rhino and it scattered apart into large pottery shards. Out of these however came a small gnome, that uttered a barrage of nasty belligerent words and scurried off into the underbrush, dirt and garbage by the road side….
Ganesha spoke” See, these -(pointing into the direction of the disappearing midget) these create their own obstacles and identify themselves by all these obstacles! The more obstacles they have, the more important they consider themselves.”
I walked over to the scattered shards of the busted Rhino. “ And I,” I asked “ I did not choose you!
I touched one of the shards and >>Boooooom!
The Rhino was there again in full size and very much a living breathing Animal! 🙂

Good for you you did NOT choose that Rhino! See, what came out of it!
You would have gotten nothing but….. obstacles!

You deal with other people’s obstacles every day.”

He waved a large black tail of ?? hair??

He brushed me and the floor around all of us with that whisk….
then he said: “Go, get your own Rhino!
Now, go home!”
Oh yes, there was the call back!

Again I was flabbbbberghastered!

!!??!!

And yes, I got my own little Rhino!
At the pottery market in Bhagtapur one of our group friends saw a teeny tiny Rhino, just like the one in the Animal circle tray in the ritual room and – I got that as a little present.

It is the one now with my Nepali Shaman Altar things…..
Thank you, Devi!

.

green ganesha

Tomorrow is Tuesday!

What obstacles should Ganesha remove for you?
😉

Rhino vision:

Then, in the Spirit of beginning and opening ourselves to the shamanic teachings to be presented, Bhola asked us to drum and rattle, sing, move, dance and call in our personal Guides, Deities and ancestral Animal Spirits. Bhola himself had donned his red and white bandana and his Peacock feather headdress, his bells and malas and now began to drum and to chant in a very beautiful voice.
We all followed suit, everyone in their own way.

It was quit5e a dis-tonal symphony.

No sooner had I notice the high falsetto voice of one of the participants, that this very sound changed into muddy foot prints…. belonging to a small Jungle Cat with black, grey and dark brown fur……
Where is Lira? Oh! There, up on that large Sal tree! The rest of “the gang assembled beneath it, but somehow stayed in the background.
I felt a little confused.
Why were they not coming over to me and why was I rooted to the very ground?
A HUUUUUUUUUUUUUGE shadow rose over me. It started to shimmer sun coloured, then turned to grey.

A Huuuuuuuuuuge Rhino materialized right before me, in the space between my Miahanits and me.It chewed his cut and started to “transmit” concern and “being in charge”
I lowered my Rattle and bowed down before this formidable Spirit of the Land.
With much decisiveness and authority it transmitted:
“Here Rhinos teachers about how to deal with anger and aggression, – and short-sightedness!
Rhinos in the wild are sensing the aggressions of other Beings, especially other Rhinos and that is, how these Animals keep their distance and their personal space in the wild of the jungle, where visibility is limited. So ifffff there is a person, who is passive aggressive and nasty, Rhinos can sense that and they will “stay away” and not show themselves = not be seen by that Being……!!
“Short sighted Beings are Beings, that do not have the full picture, but charge and lash out anyway”
Short sighted Beings that just charge out, may not be able to see the full impact of their behaviour……”As if to illustrate this point, a small belligerently grumbling gnome materialized… and promptly changed into a small Rhino……..
“Beings like Rhino may not even think, they did anything wrong” They are just covering up fear and insecurity with preventative acts of…….. They need to………
….. Peter, who was next to me, touched me…. I started to shake violently, the vision disintegrating…….. Somehow I was still rattling and…. nobody else was…….They were all done and Bhola looked at me and then started talking …. something about….?? No idea…..
I tried to get the shaking under control and concentrated on breathing slow and even.
I find it hard, when an important journey is ripped apart like that, but I am in Bhola’s circle and there is much to learn……
OK!
Get it together, Mi-Shell!!

I opted for writing down, what I had seen, because is was VERY relevant and helpful !

teachings

Shamanic journey during Dalva’s teaching circle:

As I had previously mentioned I was participating in a teaching circle about Finnish shamanic traditions that practitioner Dalva Lemminmäki gave in Toronto. She spoke about Finnish traditions, Tree worship, a Finish creation myth involving the egg, about working and journeyingand many other things. We also did a 1 hour long shamanic journey. here is what happened on my journey:

Dalva had previously explained, that in her tradition one drums for at least an hour, often 2 to 3 and that she at times drums up to 5 hours when journeying after sun down until sunrise next morning.

I agreed with her, that too is Siberian practice, but here in the very popular “shamanic workshops” they do a number of short 10 minute trips – which is why many people in the end have trouble journeying and rarely go into full (theta brainwave) trance…..

In the circle several people were drumming, using frame drums and djembes, others had rattles, others also chanted or sang… I was a bit like a prolonged community drum circle, but pleasant. I prepared my fur, so I could lay down on Ee’ren Eder ( my Reindeer Spirit and Clan Guide, represented in physical reality through my Reindeer fur, used for journeying only.) – To put the fur into the tight chair would not work and it was comfortable to use the armrest of the chair to keep the drum level….To drown out some groaning and squealing that was going on, I settled into a steady 180/ minute beat.

.I “see” Lira (my Screech Owl Guardian) flying ahead of me ~~ 2 meters above the ground, leading the way through a scraggggly Forest with lots of rocks, gray granite with veins of white quartz, huge boulders, deep barren ravines, boggy at times, Aspen and Spruce, underbrush with Blueberry bushes… It is a gray evening on a cold rainy day.

We come up to a steep rock wall. Lira lands on a small Spruce Tree that is almost leaning against the steep incline. I have to step across a wide crack in the rocky ground to get there and – – – find myself standing on the granite rock cheek of a GIANT!!!Forest Spirit Person, that has been here forever. I am standing on his left cheek, in front of his massive granite nose, to my right looking up into his GIANT eye and furrowed brow high above it. Looking down, to my left I see the Giant opening his cavernous mouth with large ivory colored teeth and then and there I am being sucked towards that, I see his tong like a giant Beaver tail… I am sucked into this maw and slide down a long tubular “riffely tunnel, that must be his gullet. Like coming down a water slide I am splashed into a large reddish brown glistening cave. There are – like stalagmites and stalactites – but all made from living flesh and bone. Nevertheless, there are rock drawings and carvings in red and black everywhere on these formations. In the middle the cavernous stomach is a large fire. Beyond that, further down there is a dark black tunnel..

A little back from the fire there sits an old man, skinny, with white hair,

– – playing a kantele!

I recognize Väinämöinen!

Oh!! now even in the trance journey I know, where I am!

The belly of the Forest Giant!:)

There also is, on the other side from Väinämöinen a large Bear sleeping further in the back and a large Moose is sitting in the center on a rock. He is crying. In his lap he is holding one of his broken of antlers, while a strange stubble on his head is rapidly growing into a sizable Wapiti Elk antler. Then the other large majestic Moose antler falls of and the Moose wails in futile desperation. “ They will not know me!!!!” he wails, while a small bird settles on the now quickly growing Elk horn and starts chirping loudly.

canada-moose

Moose

I try to help the inconsolable Moose, try moulding the second, just growing rack into a more Moose like looking antler, flattening it out a bit, …. But I need more stuffff and grab dripping spittle and juice from the belly stalagmites and some flesh from the ground nearby. Like as if it was puddy I manage to form it all into a Moose antler. – But for the other side it was already too late – that one was fully hardened into a sizable Wapiti antler. Now however Väinämöinen on the other side of the fire starts to sing and to my and the Moose’s high horrrror the newly formed Moose antler changes into another Elk/ Wapiti horn and then , oh shock, the whole Moose changes into a Wapiti Elk in front of my eyes.

Wapiti Elk

Lira appears and gives me more “cave spittle juice” and I rub the animal with it and it starts to flimmer and shimmer as a Moose again… – until Väinämöinen again starts to sing…. When he stops the animal is half Elk, half Moose and a mess.

Then, all of a sudden I hear a loud sound – and almost “wake up” Someone in the room (tonal) started to sing or whatever and the disturbance transformed into a strange egg yolk yellow cube with bright red Chinese writing symbols on all sides. !!??!! (6 inch x 6 inch cube)

(This strange cube appeared several more times – whenever there was a disruptive -to me- sound in the room that “made me come up” from the trance. I just resolved to drum a little louder, so as not to hear it and went back “down”)

I went back to the cave. The Moose/ Elk Wapiti and Väinämöinen I are gone, the Bear is awake and brings me a Pow Wow drum to look at. He tosses it into the fire and now I also see Lira sitting there with several old movie reels and bits of ripped film, that she tosses into the fire.- – –

– – I say:“YES!! I KNOW!!!! I WILL tell her and explain – (like sooo many others )– and just hope she will not take it the wrong way…“ I promised the Bear. Healing comes with understanding – on both sides….

When I look again there is part of Dalva’s skirt in the fire, halfway burnt.-

– Again the scene is split up by a loud noise and the yellow cube with Chinese kanjis…

When I get back there, it feels like “late” But now the fire is out and through a vapory smoke I see a black Wolf with a white triangle on his chest standing at the entrance of the passageway into the gut of the Giant, beckoning me to follow him.

I do, through the gut of the Giant….. On and of there are flashes of the Chinese kanji cube, but I just disregard them…

We get to a place, that is the beginning of the “Fire River” there are several Beings there, but again loud noises make me start to shake and “be tossed up”and hear the 2 3 4 drumming = Oooo Oooo Oooo Oooo…..>

By the time I am back down I am “not very deep” and hear the room in the background.

For a flash I see Sandra D. sitting at the River’s edge reading a book made up out of Oak leaves.

I now “know” where I am and ask the Wolf to show me something that I need to know or bring back . Right away the crying Moose/ Elk appears and Lira with the stupid movie reel lands in my lap – Literally! Nice! Yes, OK, again….. I will not forget to tell…

Lira leads me up to the stomach cave with the rock art. There I see a white envelope hanging among the Medicine symbols. It says “Message” and Lira directs me to take it and open it. I do – but>>> again the strange yellow cube with the red Chinese writing…

Shitt… x#*ZZOOßo**^#ZZ*ßpvochchch!!!!!

I think I loudly say something like that and wish I had not…. 😦

But I am halve “awake” and realize, the drumming has almost stopped – it is just me and the djembe left….

Dalva is winding down the journey …

Someone sings and promptly there is the yellow cube again…

I have to return – never mind the other messages… I feel being dragged own by a soup of heavy molasses and struggle against it… I should journey on, but I am no at home but at Dalva’s circle….

I struggle against the sour smelling molasses until Lira brings a watering can with “Muskoka rain water from the flood” and douses me until the molasses comes of.

I feel Peter and Janet next to me…….

.

.

So….

What does it all mean?

Well:

In one of the Runes = song/ poems Elias Lönrot used for the Finnish folk epos the Kalevala, is about Antero Vipunen, who is seen as the primodeal Elder shaman, an ancient Forest Spirit on a perpetual journey hidden deep in the Forest, turned to stone, incorporated into the living Earth. He holds a lot of secret wisdom and even the sage Väinämöinen went to him for wisdom and to learn a Rune that would aid him in “singing himself a boat” (creating a Rune = chant -vehicle that allows him to go on a shamanic journey)

I traveled to this Being,

Lira is one of my Miahanits – Medicine Guides….. Read more on : https://shamanicdrumm.wordpress.com/2012/02/09/134/

The Moose/ Elk Wapity: During Dalva’s teaching talk she referred to her special Guardian ans an Elk – and the picture that came across to me (in pre-verbal imagery ) was a Moose. However, most of the circle participants – hearing the word “Elk” envisioned a Wapiti, like we have out in Western Canada.

Wrong critter. The Moose in the cave – and in the Kalevala is upset because he is not seen by Canadians as / for what he reallllly is!

Here for the First nations out West, that are familiar with Elk he stands for sexual prowess and allure while the Moose, Hottha (Ojibwa) or Moosee (Cree) is the sacred balance of gentleness and strength within a human – and other Being

Meaning : these 2 have VERY different Medicines and the Moose in the journey wants to be seen for what he is….

I try to fix him in the journey, but Väinämöinen starts singing = the Kalevala itself talks about Elk and – so I can not fix that….

The strange yellow cube with the bright red Chinese writing is a visual manifestation for the sounds, that I am not used to, during journeying (they are yellow = alarm and red Chinese = to me = unknown and foreign. But they also represent the circle members, the many for whom journeying was unknown and new and foreign. And the Chinese writing yet again emphasizes the communication gap that exists due to language barriers in the circle……

So on one side it is Chinese to me to hear strange sounds during journeying but on the other side I could be the translator… ifffffappropriate of course…..

The Drum , the film reels and the Bear.

Bear is for healing and much healing needs to be done. Healing comes through understanding the other better. Many First Nations People consider 1234 = drumming “White man’s war drum tom tom drumming a’ la’ in the old Westerns, when you hear the war drums and the Natives circle the burning wagon train and… You all know…

So nowadays there is resentment against this and it comes up, when First Nations Elders hear none Natives play that rhythm on a drum. Some are quite vocal about it…..

It happens often and on several occasions I had to defuse the situation with teachings for both sides and so bridge the gap…..

What many first Nations so far are not yet familiar with is, that other shamanic Ancestor ways – like in Europe and South America use this rhythm and it is part of their culture and not just miss appropriated or picked up from an old movie… We in Siberia for example use this drum rhythm as one of the East rhythms – to ward of unknown disease Spirits that usually – as seen by my people – approach from the unknown future = East. For us Bear guards against these. So here Bear is well aware and points out the problem by tossing the old Pow Wow drum into the fire and Lira adds snippets of moovie reels….

When we shamanic practitioners from other cultures play this rhythm in Native American company we should be wise to qualify = explain, where we got this rhythm from and why we play it right now and maybe ask, ifffff it is OK with the “Spirits of Place”

In this case it comes from Dalva’s Finnish tradition and that is wonderful and very spiritual. And yes, there are many drum circle songs with that rhythm and also some First Nations chants from the Southern tribes = rain songs for example…. Not that we need more rain in Ontario right now….

Here we are being made aware of cultural sensitivities – no rain songs when there are floods – or no John Wayne drumming ….

And Yes, my Guides alert me to the problem and tell me to explain to Dalva, because it is her skirt that was burnt in the fire = “something” happened somewhere in the recent past and the smoke is still in the air but the fire is out.

The Wolf leads me to another realm I “know” from studying the Kalevala: The River of Death, where the old shamaness, the mother of the hero Lemminkäinen has to revive her son, who got killed and tossed there. This is a place, where she sang healing Runes that are very powerful…

Kallela_Lemminkainens_Mother

I still wonder, what she would have sung to me…

I will have to go back to visit her another journey…

As Dalva said in her teaching: In Finland and in Siberia we journey for looooong times – and 1 hour just flew by. When a journey needs to be aborted – or I get “tossed out” by – the proverbial phone ringing, someone touching me, or whatever, I often start to shake quite badly and it takes a while until I am back in OC…..

This time it felt like being stuck in heavy molasses that was dragging me back….

Later in the evening Dalva and me had a long wonderful talk and several other practitioners joined in.

🙂

Blessings to all circle participants who read this! 🙂

Shrew

shrew

.

Go ask the Shrew

about what’s bothering you

She’ll dive into a hole

to go, ask the Mole

that’s blind but can see

the world’s mystery

.

He’ll speak to the Shrew

who’ll write it to you

with tracks in the snow

so you see and know

.

Have a gift for the Shrew

for working with you

Short Tailed Shrew 5.3.2013

Short Tailed Shrew

A “visit” with Grandma Ulali

….Continued from the last post about the new little Ongon Spirit:

The blue colour is, what I said, thought or did, red however is, what the Spirits I saw, questioned and interacted with transmitted in pre-verbal “language” or in words, scenes / pictural transmissions.

 

It was late evening. I sat in my rocking chair and started rocking – No drum or anything needed – It was just time to “go”

I was at the Air Cave of Ulali Kirgaa’n A’wa. `

The little Spirit was dancing with a fur covered beater and a large Evenki-style drum.

What shall I do with him /her?”

 

Let her be! And let her serve you, not the other way around. This one is a Bitshhi’i Balder = minor minion, created by man for the trade, NOT a sacred Spirit of old.

She would like to be very important and and that you serve her. She is from the Denger Kög tradition(Blue Sky tradition)

Let your Ee’rens be in charge of her, to find out, if any new student has the Algyrey =Gift or the Grace of their Ancestors = is any good or if you are wasting your time and they do not have it, – just neeeeeeed……

Take her to the Ulug Chorum and let her dance there!”

The Ulug Chorum (That is one of the LARGE spoked Stone Wheels we have in Siberia)

It appeared large and in full Summer Sun with a steady stiff South-East Wind blowing. The little Bronze Spirit danced and plaid her drum.My new students were there, sitting at different cardinal points.

All my Eerens were sitting in the North in a row while the little Spirit danced around one specific student to find out …. = All that came out was a blue and brown Jesus Icon in a wooden frame.  It was thin as a shroud and tore easy, threads flowing away in the wind…..

Hmmm…..

Then Janet, a lady that as of late is studying with me came into focus: I watched, as the scene changed and I saw -(with guidance of Grand-awa Ulali) “Let her: A picture of a darkened room, windows covered and her, with all her paints and a canvas, that already had beige -brown and some russet red on it.. She wore ear-phones and the trance drum tape on, full kilter… She was supposed to paint like this, with the tape running… “

Then there was Jane, another one one of my new students: “– There she was, at the  living room table in my house, just looking at the Faerie deck, that I want to sell and all kinds of Fairies were falling out of her head into the deck and then ran through the room. … She took a dust broom  and swiped them all up and put them back into the box and put the box into her bag…… from where they all crawled back into her head….

NO problem there I guess.

Back at the Ulug Chorum.

Ulug Chorum = ritual circle3

All my Ee’rens were still watching….

The Spirit figurine still drummed and danced.

Should I use her as an Ongon ? For whom, for Umai Ee’ene?”

Would you want to stick such a vast Energy into a small static cold Bronze figurine???????”

Well – NO!!!!”

The 9 holed spoon I saw on that site from Nicholas BW came into my sight!

Should I get that! I love that!!!!”

What do you want with that? It is for a Dengeri. You are not Dengery, you are of the Kara Tschere’= Black Earth!

Take your blue scarf, that is all you need to honour the Sky Spirits.”

Then I asked about E. and the surgery and if it would go well.

The answers I got however are too private to put here, but a couple of weeks later they proved to be accurate.

The Grievances of the Clan Guardians

My husband persuaded me to sign up to the Shamanic Practitioner’s Conference that this year is taking place at the “Edge” retreat center just outside Algonquin park.

The organizer had put out a “request” to try and journey to the Loon to find out information about what the subject of this conference is supposed to be!??

I found that somewhat strange, but on the other hand, it then is a participation-driven event and I quite enjoy these better than “workshops” and lectures…

These days my household is quite busy with a good friend staying with us, with Bearpaw, our business, and with clients, patients and students needing attention. So during the day i did not find the time to journey, but in the evening A. and me attended our weekly drum circle and while the group played on the large Grandmother Drum I remembered the journey request the organizer of the thaand closed my eyes:

For me the Loon is inevitably Maang, the “ Ee’ren – or “Manitou” of all the Loons everywhere on Mother Earth.

He also is the Clan Guardian of the Anishinaabe Loon Clans and as such I have had dealings with Him on several previous occasions.

So I was not surprised to find myself immediately in the middle of the primordial waters just after the Great Flood with Nananboojou sitting astride on Gineebik, the Great Underwater Serpent and surrounded by the assembly of Clan Guardians.
2 of my personal Guardians accompanied me and also sat down on the log-like Snake.
I was somehow suspended in the water.
Maang was there too and I had brought a Fish for him as an offering and then presented my request for a Medicine Message to him. He however did not eat the fish but draped it onto the back of Gineebik and addressed me, while all the other Manitous moved closer to listen. There of course also was the Crane, the Marten, the Sturgeon, the Deer, the Bear, the Birds who are the other main Clan Guardians……
Maang spoke in a “grovely picture language” = lots of gravely rough pebbles in and among the images….which were greyish brown and …sad.
It went something like this: I will tell you my message, so you can bring forward my grievances:
There were scenes of people driving loud and smelly motor boats up and down a lakes or waterway and waves were splashing ashore and into a Loon’s nest drenching it….
There was a knotty ball of fishing line with rusty poky hooks littering the lake’s bottom and entangling garbage and debris.
There were these gray lead weights in and among the rocks.
There was a dead loon,bloated and floating in the shallows……………
I felt put on the spot and did not know anything else as to say, other than how sorry I was…
I felt awful!
.
No sooner had Maang stopped transmitting his message, when Ajechau, the Crane stepped forward and repeated every image Maang had shown me.
There however was also the image of a group of nesting trees being cut down and…..?? The drum group had stopped playing the first rhythm and started talking, but A., with some shamanic experience,  saw, what was going on and started a steady fast trance rhythm, that transported me back to the scene.
.
But it was to get a lot worse, as next Wabi zashi, the Marten spoke up and showed me a horrrrrrible fur farm – somewhere outside – or near New Liskard, where 2 middle aged men worked. One of them was smoking. Martens, Mink and other fur bearing Brothers and Sisters were transferred into small cages and these cages were then put into an old freezer truck and a hose was attached to the exhaust and into the compartment and then the engine turned on. Then the men left… the horror and suffering that came next made me nauseous and still does again now…..
When the men returned ?? the next day??, they skinned the Marten People and put the carcasses on ice –?? for a business that makes canned cat food…..!!!!!!
The Pelts were to be shipped to Hong Kong.

.
The Next Manitou that spoke up to me was Wawashesh-shee the Deer.
He showed me a place outside ???Huntsville??? where a butcher works. This man cuts up the Deer and Moose People and prepares their meat for the hunters to take home. But the hunters do not want the legs and the heads and most also do not want the fur. So it is all “dumped” in a remote bush location.
The leader of the Deer Clan wants the people to use the hides!
Like it was done – before……
There is a man, I saw his face and got his name… D. (I will not write THAT here on the internet…)
He would gladly give away the hides free to people!
I again said I was sorry and promised I would tell here, so these hides can hopefully be used.
This is, when Gichi Maqua spoke up and stated, that he has similar grievances:
Nowadays the people hunt his kin for sport, not for food and often do not use the meat for anything other than their dogs. Also the pelts are not used and the head of hunted Bear People are not properly hung into a Tree facing east.
If this continues, illnesses and diseases will come…..
…………………………..……………………………………………………
The drum group had again stopped playing and so I did, what I was shown to do in situations like this…..
…there is a certain healing rhythm and chant .. ….
…………………………..……………………………………………………
When we slowly and gently stopped drumming, I promised to return to hear the grievances of the Manitou of the Bird Clan later that night……
I found myself back at our drumming location…….
I was a bit shaken and exhausted and F. offered me a cup of hot tea……..
.
Early yesterday morning I journeyed back to the Place of the Waters and all the Animals were there, waiting.
Somehow I had a can of Tuna and opened it and several large live fish came out. Then occurred it to me, that everyone of the Ee’rens = Manitous eat Fish….
but Wawashesh-shee said, that I was very wrong there. He ate no fish!
.
Sturgeon spoke up for the Fish Clan and showed me a devastated bottom of a huuuuge river – ? St Laurence near ?? Montreal?? with a thick layer of oily sludge on the bottom that was littered with garbage and large derbies and oil drums and also parts of machines from large boats.
It stank!
Then there was some sort of a barrier in the middle of the river that forced the large Animals to ”rise” = swim higher and into the area where the propellers of large boats would easily hurt them……
…..I could write more grisly details here, but I am upset, as it is, having to type and thereby re-live the vision here. Again I felt humiliated and sad and promised I would speak for the plight of the Fish Clan……
.
The last Clan I thought would speak up was the Bird Clan People. But the only images I got were lots of Robins, small Finches, Chickadees and Warblers singing and fluttering around between the Trees and coming to the feeder in a garden in a city.
It was just a peaceful scene and I felt sooooo relieved……
.
L. my Miahanit, told me it was good for today and I was to write all this down……
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…………………………………………..
To me the journey reminds us, that the Spirits of Place of whom Maang the Loon is one, wish to be heard and respected as such. Since the time of Beginnings they are the Guardians of the land upon which we will hold this weekend meeting. They remind is of the plight of their charges – the real wild animals – and hope, we can do something to make it better, or at least stand in respect to hear them and do our part in improving the situation.

.
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P.S.
I wondered, what the ” thing with the Tuna Fish can” was all about, and went “back” yet again today in the morning and there were only Lira, Aya…..!     and Fretty  (3 of my Miahanits on the back of Gineebik.!???!!
I asked, what that was all about and Fretty explained, that I had opened a “nasty can of fish ” that the organizers of the event had not anticipated.
I will have to deal with some repercussions, because I  posted these TRUTH, that nobody wants to look at.
Lira sayed, that  always assume that “everyone is on the same page than me”(  =vision:  all Ee’rens eat Fish….) –  But that is not so and I will get to hear about this on the conference by the people in charge there…..
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I am not surprised to hear that, given I now also read a few of the other participants journeys and … well….
…..let me find a link….